The Cookie Kleptomaniac

Last Friday and Saturday, I had a whole slew of doctor’s appointments. So, I opted to spend the weekend at home instead of taking multiple trips back and forth between my residence hall on campus and the Gold Coast. Being at home is a nice chance to get away, and this trip, I got to experience one of my favorite perks – grocery shopping with my mom.

Going to the supermarket with my mother is the bomb dot com because:

• She pays for everything
• She takes me to exotic stores, like Trader Joe’s and Whole Foods
• I get to peruse (and purchase) a variety of non-microwaveable (aka typical college) dinners

This time, our shopping extravaganza culminated in a trip to Trader Joe’s. Inspired by an all night marathon of the Food Network, with dreams of Vegetarian Satays and Cinnamon Raisin Bread Pudding dancing in my head, I went to work.

With the grandiose ideas of my upcoming meals as inspiration, I found myself nonchalantly tossing ingredients into my mother’s cart. As we were about to check out, I watched my mom inspect the cart one last time, her expression changing from confusion to disbelief, and finally, to uncontrollable laughter. It was at this moment that she pointed out to me that I will never be able to actually grocery shop by myself.

How did she come to this conclusion? Well, ever since I was a young child, I would slip food into the shopping cart, and the cashier would often ring it up without my mom noticing. (In this sense, I’m not actually a kleptomaniac, which is always a good thing). My habits don’t seem to have changed; my mom is simply better at catching me these days.

While our shopping trip ended in success – we compromised, buying Tofu Edamame Nuggets and Cinnamon Raisin Bread instead of the many ingredients for Vegetarian Satay and Bread Pudding – I do wonder how I will be able to shop next year, when I am lacking my “supermarket with training wheels,” Southside Market, and when I have to make deliberate choices on how to spend my own money.

I wish I could give you a satisfactory answer on how this will all turn out, but the truth is that I don’t know. If there has been one consistent theme throughout my one and a half years at college, it’s that this is when you learn what you can really handle, often surprising even yourself. Not only that, but things don’t always seem to work out as planned, so there is no point getting worked up about the future.

I do know that in the meantime, I’ll still be taking advantage of what I have at my disposable, even if a little “kleptomania” is involved.