Perfect Travel Is In the Eye of the Beholder

Here we are, just a couple of weeks into the semester and I’ve already crossed the border several times, doing so once again tomorrow morning as we leave for Cambodia. I’m in love with Kuala Lumpur, would absolutely take a job in SE Asia if offered one, and have officially caught the travel bug with hopes to visit Thailand, Indonesia, and hopefully some more of SE Asia over the next few months. I didn’t realize how little I knew about international travel until I became faced with constantly learning as I’m going. Preferably read while listening to Nobody’s Perfect by Hannah Montana, here’s what I’ve learned so far:

 

Fake it ‘til you make it.

So cliché. So real. Whether it’s getting through public transportation, deciphering new social situations, or just trying to enjoy each moment as it comes, I’ve learned the art of faking it solely to improve my own self-confidence and realize that I can in fact do what it takes, even if I’m on a greater learning curve. I’ve fallen up stairs so many times, have made a complete fool of myself, have been wrong about directions, and have had to ask for help more than I would like, along with a longer list of mistakes. However, it’s okay to not be okay! I’m excited to get better at traveling, but I also hope to get better about not being the perfect traveler who just posts cool Instagram pictures about how “perfect” life is without showing any of the flaws.

 

 

Finding your niche abroad is so important.

I hit just a patch of homesickness early on and I realized it was because I wasn’t connected to any of the kinds of communities I was used to. Once you find similar groups abroad, it makes all the difference, and the mutual interests make it worthwhile to overcome language barriers and push outside of your comfort zone. While it could be easier if everyone in the program all had the same interests and were all best friends, it wouldn’t be nearly as meaningful or satisfying when the authentic connections were made. While I’m an oddball in many ways in this program, that’s a good thing since it’s pushing me to not be comfortable or just sink into a single community when there’s so many things to do and people to meet here.

 

 

Comfort Zone. Learning Zone. Panic Zone. Repeat.

As a challenge course facilitator, one of the biggest philosophies we teach participants is that of these three zones. Your comfort zone is just that, comfortable and not a challenge. Imagine you have the whole house to yourself for the day and no responsibilities, just getting to enjoy the day however you want. Next is the learning zone, where you want to be most of the time. This is where you are growing but not pushing yourself to a panic. It’s kind of like when you’re at the gym and in order to build up muscle you have to tear it down by doing hard workouts. However, you don’t want to push yourself too hard, less you pull a muscle or in this case, fall into your panic zone. This is where you are not comfortable whatsoever and experiencing anxiety, terror, the like and need to return to your comfort or learning zone ASAP. I’ve experienced all three of these abroad already and even though I like to challenge myself, it’s important to realize that you’re allowed to be in your comfort zone, and when you’re ready you can push yourself back into your learning zone. Whenever I’ve gotten close to my panic zone, my favorite thing is to walk around the city by myself to a new coffeeshop, as this is what I do all the time in Chicago. I love working out by myself too, so sometimes I do that as well. And sometimes, I really need to escape for a bit and the great thing is that Netflix not only works in Vietnam, but also has shows that you can’t get in the US. I stay in my comfort zone for however long I need, and then move back into having fun and adventuring in new ways.

 

 

Find the right travel buddies.

This one is definitely important! With all of the things to see and do around SE Asia, it’s incredibly important to find the right people to travel with. There’s really no hard feelings about not being perfect travel buddies with everyone, so you just need to know yourself and figure out who you travel well with! Every trip should be enjoyable, not high stress past the usual, and have at least a little bit for everyone. It may take a period of trial and error to find the right crew, but once you do, it makes it all the better. For me personally, I’m very go with the flow but definitely have weird ticks that make it hard to be travel buddies with everyone. That’s true of every person. One thing I know about myself is that I prefer to go through airports by myself or with very specific people, so I don’t mind booking flights that are the same time but different airlines. Outside of that, I love getting to see what everyone else wants to do and tag along for the ride! (As long as I eat some food and preferably get to hike in the mountains, I’m set). Communication is key, especially early on.

 

 

Enjoy the moment and say yes.

A few years ago I don’t know if I would have said yes to studying abroad in Vietnam, but I’m so glad that I am where I am in life right now and get to say that I’m studying abroad in SE Asia. I’m excited to look back at this in 20-30 years, and when I do, I want to make sure that I enjoyed it to the fullest and have no regrets. Sometimes this means saying yes to not being in control or saying yes to things you may have pre-judgments about or don’t think that you’ll like. What I hope is that I’ll leave here knowing I said yes to everything I wanted and needed to and was able to say no to what I absolutely didn’t. I want to be completely authentic, letting my yeses be yeses and my no’s be no’s. Let this semester be one full of life lessons, mistakes, and challenges. Besides, what good story ever becomes of someone doing everything exactly right?

 

 

 

Added Bonus: Food for thought (who said I never gave you anything?)

Vemödalen – “the frustration of photographing something amazing when thousands of identical photos already exist”.

“You can kiss your family and friends goodbye and put miles between you, but at the same time you carry them with you in your heart, your mind, your stomach, because you do not just live in a world but a world lives in you.” -Frederick Buechner