The GoGlobal Blog

Reflection Turns to Action

Reflection Turns to Action

My time in a world far, far away is almost coming to a close. It’s impossible to believe that I’ve spent nearly four months in VIETNAM of all places in the world, and the lessons that I’ve learned here will last a lifetime. I’ve done more in one semester than I ever thought possible, and even still I felt like there was so much more to do. While I won’t be able to fully reflect on my time abroad until I’m home, I’ve started thinking about all of the things about Vietnam that I’ll miss (and trying not to think about the things that I won’t) and have even started making Pinterest boards of ways to incorporate Vietnamese food into my diet back home. I’ve been asked by every professor if I would consider coming back, and I would emphatically answer yes, although maybe not just to Vietnam or for an extended stay. I still have so much more of the world to go but I’m glad I started here!

Memories from the first trip to Malaysia!

The amount of markets I’ve been to this semester is nauseating, but I just can’t stop. It’s almost become an addiction wherever I travel in SE Asia. The scariest market experience I’ve ever had was in the famous Ben Thanh Market in Saigon. It’s the most touristy and also the most aggressive market. I went just to say that I went, with no real intention of buying anything here because there are several cheaper and more local markets around. However, when in Saigon, you must attend! As I walked through the numbing amount of aisles, I thoroughly enjoyed squeezing past crowded stalls and being poked and prodded to buy something, even to the point of being followed for several minutes to come back to one person’s stall. After I escaped I realized what a hilarious experience it is, and then proceeded to hit up some of my favorite local-business/hipster markets around town.

Kayaking in Halong Bay – The day before they shut it down completely

Another aspect of life here that I’ll miss is how cheap everything is. I know, I know, I’m a cheapskate. But when you can get by for $3 a day, it changes you. I have epically failed in sticking to such a budget just because the cheapness of everything tempts you to buy more, but I don’t regret any purchases I made or experiences I had because I’m coming away with so much more than monetary value. There are many frustrations that come with being a foreigner, most decidedly how an “authentic” experience is far from achievable. As a white female who doesn’t speak the language, I can get close but never be truly involved in the real lives of the Vietnamese. I struggle with this fight every day between my desire to be a part of the community and my recognition of my status as a foreigner who has few avenues to become involved. I have this never-ending feeling of not having done enough but I also have a long list of accomplishments from this semester. While the Vietnam Center was nothing like I unconsciously expected, I still learned so much.

A group picture before heading up Mt. Fansipan!

There’s going to be so much more that I’ll miss. What I do love is how robust the culture is here if you know where to look. On one Sunday morning, I was on the back of an uber bike and as we drove along the river, I saw a group of local people having a drawing and painting class. It was a beautiful moment, and sparked my interest in how the arts are used in Vietnam. On that same uber bike ride, I rode past a man biking with an open flame in his basket, an extremely hip couple dressed to the nines having a photo shoot, naked children running on the street, and one of my now favorite coffee shops. Thinking back on all these moments of absurd contradictions and times of confusion, you just have to laugh and go with it. There have been so many days that I’ve been tempted to give in to the cynicism that one can face when you are constantly challenged, and some days I have given in. More often than not, I’ve somehow found the courage to laugh. The blend and struggle between modern and traditional is as clear as day when you step outside the dorm gate. Back to the art, there’s also a huge influence of pottery and music on society here. As much as I sometimes despise it, karaoke is a monumental part of the daily life of a Vietnamese person. To see such a blend of art from painting workshops to poetry to song and dance (Vietnamese break-dancers are amazing) has been something that’s brought life to my study abroad experience. In a place that I didn’t have any specific expectations from, I had the time and inspiration to find my own creative voice.

Studying abroad has added so many more dimensions to my college career and even to me as a person. This semester I had time to grapple with who I, Kelly Ravenscraft, really am and what parts of me were just borrowed from other people or from definitions of who I thought I was supposed to be. If I were to do anything differently, I would have asked more questions, especially more difficult questions of other people, and would have tried to be more intentional with asking the Vietnamese partners. Even just taking someone out for coffee feels different here, but I wish that hadn’t stopped me from continuing trying throughout the rest of the semester. I struggled with community this semester as I was cut off from all of my normal communities and wasn’t exactly used to being thrown out of my comfort zone in this way. I wish that I hadn’t been afraid of awkward one-on-ones, as I never had been before back at home. Even with other big personalities, I wish I had been my “full” self the entire semester. It took a lot longer for me to get comfortable with the community here than I was used to, but I also think that it took longer to be my real self because this semester was dedicated to actually understanding who that real self is. Even if there are small things that I wish I could change, I don’t regret any part of my Vietnam experience. I’m so happy that I went to the Loyola Vietnam Center as my first study abroad program, and I’m hopeful to go abroad a second time, preferably to a direct enrollment program so that I can continued to be challenged! If you’re considering studying abroad, I urge you to pursue it, no matter the financial cost or the anxiety that may accompany your decision at first. I still have so much more to reflect on (and more blogs to post!), but overall I’m excited to see where the next step of my journey forward takes me. No matter where you are in your journey, I urge you to step outside of your comfort zone and get lost in the thrill of it all. Chase after fears with a goal of overcoming them, seek out love and community in places you’d never think to find them, and jump at any chance to see the world with a perspective you could never have without seeing another side of the world. Go forth and set the world on fire.

 

“I am not the same having seen the moon shine on the other side of the world”.

– Mary Ann Radmache

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