Too often, people only consider service learning as an opportunity to help others; they see it as an avenue to be a good citizen, and more importantly, a good human being. I have taken a different approach, however. As I will be discussing, I view service learning as just as big of an opportunity to figure myself out and who I am just as much as helping others.
Working with a refugee family will be a mutual learning experience, where I will reflect upon my own culture, and also gain insight into a culture outside of my frame of knowledge. There is absolutely too much to learn from an experience like this, but I have narrowed it down to three points I really hope to take away from service learning:
1. I want to contrast two cultures. Having never left America, I feel that it is imperative for me to get a taste of how my destination’s culture is. I hope to be a good listener, and hear out any concerns that my family may have. Living in a big city like Chicago has been a culture shock to me at times, so I can only imagine what its like for someone who has come here with little to no knowledge of how everyday systems work. One concern I have is: will I be able to draw upon my experience here to help me serve in communities abroad? I also hope to have good communication with my family, despite language barriers.
2. I intend to play off of my strengths and weaknesses. I consider myself to be a very open person. I wear my heart on my sleeve and always intend to relate to any emotion a friend or colleague shows me. I understand that this will be quite a challenge, but this is the perfect opportunity to improve my weaknesses. At times I may be a bit shy, but I have no doubt that forcing myself to be in this position will do wonders for my confidence.
3. I look forward to not only relating to my family, but also feeling a sense of friendship with them. There is already so much that I look forward to exploring with them. I want to see the city with them in a new light and take on opportunities to enhance and embrace American culture.
My biggest concern is the social injustices that refugees face. Whether it is learning English, access to quality health, housing, or education, I want to feel like I have a better understanding of these issues and how to handle them. I cannot say it will be easy, and I am positive that I will want to do so much for my family, however certain issues may be out of my hands.
I’ve often thought about what a normal day will be like for each of these refugees. I intend to learn just as much from them if not more, than from what I can share with them. It is also important for them to learn about me — jobs, educational differences, social activities, and so much more. I hope that when this is all said and done, I will have made memories of a lifetime.

Refugee Resettlement Spring 2013
Reflection 3

Working with my refugee family this semester has been an experience of personal growth that allowed me to take value in my ability to connect and build strong relationships with perfect strangers. With each meeting, we shared more stories, taught one another about our cultures, and bonded over universalistic qualities of family, working, and aspirations. What I have come to learn is that however starkly contrasted our backgrounds may be, we had more in common than not. I became a part of this family as they allowed me in their new life here. They lovingly refer to me as Jasminka, with Russian dialect, and share secrets like the mother’s habit of smoking a cigarette on the back porch when she thinks her husband will not notice. This has also been a troubling experience that has left me feeling that the problems these refugees face are never ending and the realization that they are truly the most resilient of humanity. I tell everyone I meet about my family and praise them for their accomplishments and desire to make their place in American society. Unfortunately, much of the US is misinformed and harbor negative feelings toward refugee and immigrant populations. In light of the Boston bombings, some one actually had the nerve to tell me that it was the fault of the people I am working with; their home country is Chechnya. Despite such backward thinking, hope remains for refugees who are warmly welcomed by those concerned with quality of life for all humanity such as the Voluntary resettlement agencies, and other non profit organizations that help create an easier transition into American life.
One issue refugees must tackle and that I dealt with personally with my family is the complicated process of our healthcare system for newcomers. On our first few visits, my partner and I were bombarded with questions and medical sheets. The father desperately voiced his concerns to us that after a dozen vaccinations he feared he might die in the hospital. He was insistent that his family was screened and vaccinated while in Moscow and he was unable to comprehend notices from the school nurses to update his children’s vaccines. The only thing we could offer them was our consolance and explanation of high standards of health here in the states. This involves pre-screening: each refugee applicant is required to have a medical examination in their country of origin by a panel of physicians selected by the US state department. Upon arrival to the United States a review of overseas documented health evaluation, completion of medical history, review of vaccination status, and a brief mental status examination is required and necessitated by VOLAGs (voluntary agencies like Catholic Charities and Ethiopian Community Association of Chicago).
The need to visit multiple facilities on multiple occasions, often without easy access to transportation can extend the process to several weeks. Living in a city is beneficial because of public transportation, but I was told by my family that they only receive one transit card per household. One can see where this could become pricey especially for large families. This affects the refugee family and also puts VOLAG’s funding at risk if the screening is not completed within the required time frame. We had to reschedule a lot of our time spent together due to numerous medical appointments. Also, there is a lack of cultural knowledge and competence not only for newly resettled refugees but for some mainstream health care providers who may not have experience working with interpreters and may not have knowledge about the circumstances from which particular refugee groups come from. Working with interpreters requires more time than standard medical visits. Also not all health care providers are trained to identify signs of PTSD. My family often complained of dizziness and headaches after leaving the hospital, but they worked through it and now concerns are more focused on job procurement and speaking English with as little Russian accent as possible.
Medical providers may often use only western allopathic concepts to define the health of new arrivals. Developing providers’ ability to understand different cultural systems of beliefs about health gives them a broader capacity to provide care that works. Medicaid and Medicare are provided for refugees but they typically lack dental care. Dental problems are diagnosed in up to a quarter of refugees. My refugee mom and dad often warned their kids about eating American hard candies and coated nuts, fearing they may break a tooth. I think it would be beneficial in the future for advocates to attend medical appointments with interpreters if for nothing more than to be a friend and source of comfort in a foreign process.
VOLAGs and other organizations help meet the needs of refugee populations where the state is lacking. Heartland Health Outreach annually serves thousands of medically underserved Chicagoans, filling major gaps in the region’s health care system. They provide diverse programs and services that set the standard for inclusive, multidisciplinary treatment. These culturally competent services are designed to prevent illness and improve physical, mental, and social well-being through advocacy that promotes the human right to comprehensive, integrated systems of care.
Aside from the benefits these organizations provide, my partner and I, through our advocacy have given a unique gift to our refugee family in terms of befriending. They know that they can call us or chat on Facebook and we cherish our quality time together. Moments such as a shared laughter at American television shows together can be informative; they previously held Chuck Norris as being the epitome of what it means to be “American”. Spring time was significantly memorable for me. The family seemed to have a renewed spirit and curiosity toward all that Chicago had to offer them. I learned about the celebrations for Muslim New Year called Nowruz. In return, I shared how Americans celebrate Easter by making them a basket with chocolate bunnies and gifts. We all have busy lives but have promised to set aside time to go to the beach this summer and grill outside. This course sparked my interest and I plan to do more in the way of advocacy and readjustment for the refugee population in Chicago.

GiannaCarabez

ANTH 301-Amick

Reflection 3

            As the semester is rounding out, the impending final visits weigh heavily on my mind. We have only been visiting for a short time, but in that short time we have really developed a connection to this family. In such a short time, we have built up a close friendship, one that I sincerely hope will continue past this class. Having only been here a few months, a deviation from any remote stability or routine can be a little jarring. How will my partner and I explain to our family that we won’t be coming regularly or at all?I can remember the anxious excitement of our first visit and reflect on the familiar comfort of our more recent visits.Against the informative framework of David W, Haines book Safe Haven, my preconceived notions of this experience, regarding my family’s feelings about being in America in comparison to what my class has discussed, and how our relationship would develop, has been affirmed, sustained, and challenged over the period of time we’ve spent together.

Haines details the challenges refugees face in coming to the United States, in regards to ethnicity, claiming that the U.S. seeks to impose its own identity categories on refuges once they are in this country (Haines 105). The family that I’ve spent time with came from Afghanistan just 8 months ago. Being an Afghan refugee, I could only imagine the types of ethnic stereotypes my family may have endured when coming to this country. As unfortunate as it is to say in 2013, as Americans, we are aware of the negative stigmas and stereotypes that can ensue with being of Middle Eastern decent in the U.S. post-9/11. I was not privy to the background information about my family, concerning the reasons they came to the United States, why they had to/wanted to leave Afghanistan, etc. and I must admit I am almost glad that I was not. I am not sure if there are certain policies regarding such information with the Volunteer Agencies, but I think it is beneficial in some cases not to know the exact background of my family. I had hoped that the relationship between me, my partner, and our family would develop in such a way that they would eventually disclose their stories to us on their own. That hasn’t happened yet, but I am hopeful. Being privy to their experiences from a file would take away from the overall comfort and familiarity aspect of our relationship. Not knowing the intimate details prematurely would remove any preconceived stigmas and stereotypes that could hinder our relationship.

Conversely, not knowing about their past in their country of origin left me feeling like we were overlooking their cultural history, their cultural roots. Haines describes the “good immigrant” stereotype that Americans categorize refugees, which is to say that those who perhaps fall into poverty or yearn to return home strike Americans as ungrateful (141). Several times during the course of our visits, my family would express their eagerness to learn English and how much they love America. I sometimes wondered if they have become conditioned to think and say such things in the company of Americans, not to say that they don’t truly wish or want to do those things, but that they think it is what they are supposed to say. I had expected my family to express some kind of attachment or longing to visit home or something like that, but we have yet to discuss what life was like back home. Because we have not talked about their past, I hope my family does not believe that America is a place that expects one to forget completely where they came from. My partner and I have tried to integrate culture, outside of “American” culture into our visits. I am of Italian heritage; my grandparents came from Naples Italy many years ago. One afternoon, I brought pizza over to my family’s house—it was a big hit. I explained to them that I am Italian, and gave them some background about my family, in hopes that that would convey a certain level of comfort, a safe time and place to share their story. I do not plan to ask my family about their life in Afghanistan, I would much prefer them to tell us about their life.

This experience is one that I never would have come across on my own. I am grateful for the opportunity to have been a part of this family’s life, as I hope I have instilled in them a level of trust and friendship that they have certainly given me. My concerns about this experience do not come from my interaction with the family but rather with the surrounding influences. As for improvements my strongest concern regards opportunities to learn English. Not only is there the issue of learning the language itself, but also utilizing that English in everyday situations. My partner and Iattempted to show our family everyday tasks like asking the landlord to fix the oven, how to catch the bus, and how to ask for directions. I would suggest a type of home economics class, instructing refugees on how such menial tasks function in everyday life. A positive attribute about working alongside a Volunteer Agency is the familiar attachment the members of the organization are with each family. My family recognized members of Catholic Charities as friends, a truly inspiring notion.

One of the most rewarding things about this experience happened on one of my last visits. I had just gotten to the house and was warmly welcomed by the mother and children, having not been over in a week or so because the children had fallen ill. I was taking my jacket off and Razan, the mother said to me, “have a seat, Gianna, my home is your home, you’re our family now”. I hope that our friendship only continues to develop and I can witness even more exciting transformations in the lives of this family.

Works Cited

Haines, David W. Safe Haven?: A History of Refugees in America. Sterling, VA:

Kumarian, 2010. Print.

GiannaCarabez

ANTH 301: Refugee Resettlement

At this point in the semester, my partner and I have met with our refugee family a few times at their small apartment in the city. Reflecting on our visits, I admit I am surprised that everything we have discussed in class, from initial anxieties to bonding friendships, we’ve encountered. Currently, my partner and I are engaged in the next stage of the resettlement process, befriending. After rereading my first reflection and even reflecting on the trip over to the family’s apartment, and comparing those feelings to how I feel at this point, I cannot believe the difference. I do not think thatthe befriending process is one that has a completion point, but I do believe that my partner and I are building sound relationships with the members of this refugee family.

I can remember standing outside of the apartment door, waiting anxiously to meet this Iraqi family of four, not knowing what to expect. The mother, Razan, and her young son greeted us at the door. She was very excited to see us and was quick to offer coffee and cookies. The two children were very shy at first–they sat on the couch across from me and my partner, staring blankly at us, not uttering a word. We were not fortunate enough to meet the entire family, on the first visit or the succeeding visits, as the husband always has a previous engagement. Sitting in their living-room as the program volunteer explained a bit of our hostess’ background and her ambitions to learn English and procure a job, I recalled Sarah Steimal’sjournal,Refugees as People: The Portrayal of Refugees in American Human Interest Stories, and the discussion on American’s portrayal of refugees asmerelyhuman interest stories. Particularly, this viewpoint holds that American’s view refugees as after the “American Dream”, interested in complete assimilation to the American culture, wanting a job and educational opportunities for their children. Our hostess chimed in at certain points during the introduction by our program volunteer, but what sticks out in my memory is her zealous assertion of her love for America as the basis for her reasons to come to this country. She has been so eager to learn English—she is enrolled in an ESL course and is excited each visit to show us what she’s learned. My partner and I have even got the kids to join and learn right along with their mother. After Razan’s declaration of love for America, I realized at that moment that being an American citizen has caused me to take the essence of being an American citizen for granted. As expressed in my last reflection, I hope that I can adopt the passion and genuine ambition that the matriarch of this family has.

After the first visit, I left feeling absolutely incredible–my immediate thoughts were, “can I continue these visits after this course ends?” The kids would not let us leave, clinging to us and brining out their belongings to show us and keep our attention. I feel a familial obligation to this family, even after the first visit–during and after the visit I was brainstorming different things I could teach them, different items and activities I could introduce to them. Again, I recalled the readings from class, particularly BehnamBehnia’sjounral, An Exploratory Study of Befriending Programs with Refugees: The Prospective of Volunteer Organizations. The article discussed the basis of successful integration lying in an extended support system that begins with volunteers. Our family has only been in the United States for 8 months, so their knowledge of American culture is minimal. On the first visit we chatted about Razan and the children’s interests in what they did know of American culture—she expressed her liking for pizza, and her daughter’s interest in painting her nails and interest in school. On the next visit, Razan made homemade pizza for my partner and I to enjoy during our lesson about colors and items around the house—it was a small gesture that was not only very heartwarming, but also materialized what the class readings have discussed. Razan has allowed us into her home, prepared food for us, and allowed us to be around and teach her children; the befriending process has become evidently important, as we have influence over this family’s experience and outlooks on American culture. What an invigorating, inspiring feeling to know that this family will forever associate their ideas and memories of assimilating to America with me and my partner.

The article also details the notion of expectations versus experience, suggesting that expectations may not be met by experience. I did not expect to have any attachment to this experience or this family at the onset of this class. Although my professor and the program volunteers told of their experiences and relationships with these families, I expected such a process of connecting and forming bonds to take much longer. My partner and I have exchanged numbers with Razan, upon her request, the children greet us warmly with a hug when we arrive and when we leave, (if they let us leave)-each time we visit the family, it becomes harder and harder to part ways. Although the language barrier makes explaining certain situations difficult, there is a friendly comfort that allows neither party, particularly Razan’s, to feel uncomfortable in admitting to needing help nor giving assistancewhen it is needed. Reflecting again on Steimel’s article, it is almost impossible at first not to think of these families in the way the press conveys them. According to Steimel “the press performs a significant role as a social educator” (Steimel 3). But upon getting to know them and spending a discernible amount of time with them in their personal space, they are not just a family in need of aid and rescue, they are not just a human interest story—I genuinely want to help them. I hope for the best for them in establishing themselves in this country successfully. Razan was so enthusiastic and excited not only for her and her husband to get jobs on their own, but to simply tell us that they had—materialized evidence of the befriending process at work.

Hopefully in the visits to come, Razan and the children will feel even more comfortable and share with my partner and I stories from back home and their cultural practices. Although this family seeks for American assimilation, I sincerely hope for retention of their Iraq culture as well. Ultimately, I hope that Razan and her family feel the same respect and general attachment to me and my partner as we have formed for them. My initial fears, anxieties, and general concerns we abolished in the first hour meeting with this family. Generally, I am excited for more rewarding experiences with this family, and I am looking forward to their continual success.

Works Cited

Behnia, Behnam. “An Exploratory Study of Befriending Programs with Refugees”. Journal of

Immigrant & Refugee Studies,Routledge. (2008): 5:3, 1-19. Print.

Steimel, Sarah J. “Refugees as People: The Portrayal of Refugees in American Human Interest

Stories.”Journal of Refugee Studies.Oxford University Press. (2010): 1-19. Print.

Gianna Carabez

ANTH 301

Reflection #1

            Every new year brings around a new set of resolutions–start eating healthy, make time to exercise, read a new book every month, save money–new year, new me. In my annual pursuit to live well, I have found that my efforts are quite narrowly and selfishly focused. My Jesuit education has allowed me the opportunity to step outside of myself, to experience what it really means to do something for someone else. As ANTH 301 embarks on this journey together as a class, my own personal excitement to meet the refugee families is coupled with anxious apprehension going into this experience, having never participated in  a cause of this magnitude.  My only hope is that my anxieties do not cloud the very real and important messages, lessons, and values that can be gained from this experience. There is a raw excitement about learning about the world beyond my own scope.

After reading Mary Pipher’s first chapter that discussed her own “cultural lens” (Pipher 12), my own cultural shortcomings came to mind. Although I have a multiethnic family heritage, I am quite ignorant of the customs and cultural practices that take place outside of my household. What I know about different cultures I have learned from my schooling and the latest exposé on The National Geographic Channel. Upon being immersed in the everyday happenings of families, from places on the globe I am embarrassed to admit that I have never heard of, I hope to gain an appreciation for cultural differences–from the seemingly mundane meal preparations to perhaps larger, more important cultural ideals. I am excited to learn customs and cultural practices from these families from ethnic backgrounds that I would otherwise not be exposed to.

The excitement of meeting new people and embarking on this culture shocking experience is slightly overshadowed by my fear of failure. Not only I am apprehensive about immersing myself into an environment that is completely out of my comfort zone, I am also nervous about introducing people to the customs of the United States. I am taking an American Pluralism course this semester and our first assignment is to write an essay explaining how we identify ourselves within the United States–do we define our identities by our ethnic heritage? By state/regional boundaries? The assignment forced me to evaluate what exactly it means to be American and how I will go about portraying certain customs and practices to people who have no idea about things that I encounter on a daily basis. How will I explain American concepts of space? Social taboos? Furthermore, how will I distinguish between what is and is not important to portray as essentially American? I hope that I can respectfully portray what it means to be a part of the United States and make these families feel welcomed and at home.

One of the by-products, if you will, of this experience that I am most looking forward to is the potential for forming lasting bonds and relationships with these families. Beyond the excitement of experiencing something new, past the apprehension of being in a completely foreign situation, the notions of forming and building bonds with people that I would never get the opportunity to meet under any other circumstances, is overwhelming in a way that is almost indescribable. In an almost cliché way, the students are ambassadors to these families. We are their first impression of American citizens, we are teachers and mentors, but what’s most important is not what we start out as, but what we end up being, friends, family.  I am most looking forward to the experience I cannot put educational credit and merit to.

I hope that what I take away from this experience outlasts the educational merit. I hope that the initial apprehension, fear, and insecurities are conquered by the friendly and familial welcome and warmth. As I am there to give and teach these refugee families I hope that I can learn from them in the same way. I hope this experience stands to help me look beyond myself, beyond my own little world, and opens my eyes to the raw struggle these families have endured to get where they are today. My wish in bettering myself is that I ultimately make the country, the world, in which we and these refugee families live, a better place.

In the time that my partner and I have visited the family I have noticed the difficulty and the similarities shared by Mary Pipher in the befriending process. Of course, I know that four weeks is a short time but I have seen some patterns that are parallel to things we have read about. In Pipher’s book especially I felt a real connection to the Kurdish family and the refugee family not based on their shared experience but the way in which their family is structured and bonded. Also in the meetings I’ve had I could definitely see the importance of befriending to refugees but I think to a certain extent it does have its limitations.
In my first visit I was pretty nervous and really didn’t know what to expect, except for what my partner and I had been notified about beforehand. Interaction and communication with the children was pretty simple because they had been in school for at least a year and caught on to most things pretty quickly. Their mother on the other hand was very friendly but had almost no English speaking ability, besides a few phrases. I knew this would be difficult but the eldest son was her go to translator. In the meetings after I learned that it isn’t the best for a person to have everything translated to them because of their dependence for a translator. Also I realized that if she ever wanted to learn English this wasn’t the best option for her.
In the next meetings I wanted to even see if the mother was enthusiastic or not about learning English because it seemed as though she hardly ever left the apartment. The story of the Kurdish mother’s boredom and lack of importance in a new culture made me think about these things. To my surprise she came to me with some of her homework and seemed pretty excited to read and learn something new. Although it was a slow and somewhat frustrating process she seemed to be learning some new things and I tried to use as many examples and ideas to make the point of the homework sensible. Sadly in my most recent visit she had told me that she stopped going to classes because she also had a job like her husband who we have not once met. This posed a challenging question in my mind as a cultural broker do I stress the importance of learning English from a success rate stand point? Or was it more necessary to the whole family that she had a job? It also reminded me of how important it was for the “Lost Boys” to have an education and succeed in America. Ultimately I figured that the job probably gave her some self-confidence that she had not previously showed and that English might come to her more naturally in a workplace setting. Not to mention that her kid’s futures are more important and probably better off in the long run with their parents providing all the support they’ll need.
Although my partner and I don’t really know the family’s backstory we decided not to probe or ask because we could see the togetherness of the family with the eldest son who took charge for his mom early to translate and the way he took care of his younger siblings. They really seem to be happy and bringing up difficult times didn’t seem necessary. Our limited visits mostly consisted of doing homework with the kids who were very bright and quick to pick up new things. Although they had the correct answers I struggled to identify whether or not we were hand-feeding them answers or if they really understood what they had been doing. I know I explained everything to them as slowly and as simply as I could but it was still unclear.
One thing that I found in my visits for the importance of befriending was that once in a while another Burmese family with Karen roots would visit and dispel the thoughts I had of the family being lonely. Although they had these friends they needed an outsider friend that knows the culture that they have been put into. This became more evident when the mother asked me to teach her the names for different places. She wouldn’t learn these from speaking Karen to her neighbors, it might make her too comfortable and make her lose any enthusiasm in learning. One day we decided to go to the zoo and we showed her and the kids’ different places along the way to provide real world examples and image associations. Then we asked them things like where they went to church, and where they buy food as we passed a specific place that related to the questions.
The only real limitation I can see is the fact that my partner and I are just part-time befrienders that meet with the family once a week for a short period of time and it won’t be possible to continue helping after the semester ends. Other than that, long-term befriending programs with the help of a committed staff are vital to a refugee’s understanding of a new culture. After seeing the type of depression that the Bhutanese refugees faced being alone in a new place, it was a relief to see that they had neighbors they could relate to but still, that’s not always the best thing. An outsider perspective is important to their assimilation into a new society. This wouldn’t have been apparent until the kids and mom began calling us teachers and creating a boundary that we could use to our advantage in further educating them and having them ask us whatever they wanted us to teach them.

Final

Becoming a cultural broker for the past three months I have learned a lot within the classroom and within the home of my refugee family. I’ve learned things about the family, the processing of refugees, the volunteer agency and most importantly things about myself. I definitely had some misconceptions about the refugee family before I met them but they were not as inaccurate as I hoped they would be. I would also like to share some thoughts I had on how we could improve the current situation of refugee resettlement in the United States.
One misconception I had before going in to see my family for the first time was that they weren’t going to be able to communicate with my partner and I. Turns out that I was wrong, but I wasn’t completely wrong. The mother had little to no English speaking ability, while the kids who have been in school for a year had a pretty good grasp of English for the amount of time they had been here. This barrier between us and the mother was and still is very difficult to overcome. We do have the eldest son translate from time to time, but even as fluent English speakers we were humbled and realized that it really takes a certain ability to teach English to someone very new to the language. Now the mother was in ESL classes before her job at the airport but had to stop going because of her responsibilities to five kids and her new job. After she got fired from her job I couldn’t help but feel that her inability to speak English was taken advantage of because she could not defend herself.
The volunteer agencies do offer ESL classes but I think it should be mandatory for refugees to go to these classes. As volunteers we had tried to teach the mother English but I now know my limits, and it seems almost impossible. A setting like a classroom is much better for teaching, especially with the younger children seeking attention and being rowdy. Now that she was fired I thought she would continue going to classes but it doesn’t seem that way. As long as volunteers are visiting homes and applying couldn’t the volunteer agencies get other types of volunteers that have English teaching abilities to make house visits? I really think it’s great that students like us can help, but for some of us it’s a little overwhelming.
We haven’t been able to help the mother with English but what we have done is get the five kids to do their homework and actually understand what they are doing without just giving answers. I know volunteer agencies help with enrolling kids into schools, but how much more do they do working with the school in making sure the kids are sent to the appropriate grade level? The kids we have are bright and have the talent to do work like their American peers, but sometimes I wonder whether or not their teachers understand the difficulties or issues the kids are having. I think along with a volunteer having credible teaching abilities they should be able to work with the schools and the teachers to make sure the kids aren’t falling behind, or if they are actually comprehending the coursework.
Having a language barrier was probably the only real assumption I made, but I figured that poverty might also be an issue. I was surprised to see the home furnished the way it was but I now know that’s because of the volunteer agency. Reading and looking at the amount of money we waste on wars and other things was very discouraging and I understand the hard work volunteer agencies put into making the resettlement process even happen so I can’t blame them for the lack of snack foods the kids usually complain about. I can’t even believe the government even brings in a small sum of refugees and expects them to be self-sufficient in 4 months. There has to be at least a year’s amount of welfare being given to the agencies so they can actually support them for that long. Cutting back on some discretionary spending like the military would probably do wonders for the refugees.
The U.S. Government knows who they are bringing in yet they really need to do a better job accommodating the people they bring in. They should strategically place people where they can live together with other people they can relate to while still being immersed into American culture and society. Even if the government couldn’t borrow money from another discretionary category couldn’t they allow the taxpayers to decide where their money will be going to? Much like the misconceptions of the refugees who arrive here I think the one’s in charge of these decisions see the U.S. in the same light. Working your way up from refugee status to a successful U.S. citizen is tough and I think it’s taken for granted that adjusting to a new culture and lifestyle is much different than being born into a system you’re going to live out.
Like Haines mentions, refugees are considered immigrants after arrival but still aren’t really in the same mindset or situation as an immigrant. They need to be designated an appropriate title that will benefit them, unlike the recently appointed “temporary protected status” which can hurt their chances of even staying here. This new designation will actually protect them offer free education, other necessities like food stamps that accommodate the size of the family, healthcare and employment opportunities. I don’t see why this couldn’t be done seeing how refugee numbers are a fraction of undocumented and legal immigrants.
In conclusion my misconceptions about refugees were hit or miss but I learned a lot from my three month service (that I hope to continue). I learned a lot about the process and mostly that volunteer agencies are basically at the mercy of the government’s funding and are doing what they can with who they have. Although I wasn’t as effective as a trained teacher could have been I’m honored to volunteer for an agency like Catholic Charities and I hope the submissions for changed refugee policies resonates with the higher ups and something is done about it. Refugees are at a disadvantage and that should be enough for new policies to be put together in order to help them thrive in the U.S.

When I first decided to join this class I knew that I had an opportunity to make a difference in the lives of others. Although I have not been presented with a family to help yet, I am very excited and nervous to get started. From this experience I am expecting to learn more about my family’s country of origin and that country’s refugee issues. In accordance to their country’s problems I’d like to get a better understanding as to what we can do in the states to better our refugee programs.
Even though I am very excited to start helping my refugee family I am also very nervous because of language barriers and the first encounter. I am normally in my everyday life a very quiet, to myself person and am not very good at sparking conversation. This makes me nervous in my first encounter but I believe my drive to help others can bring out a more creative and social side that can enable me to get the most out of this experience. I’m hoping that by the end of the semester my refugee family will be more comfortable with living in Chicago and that my partner and I will have made a difference in their lives in a positive way.
Something I think that benefits me in this whole experience is that I was born and raised in Chicago. I am hopeful that I can use this to help my family get accustomed to behavioral patterns of the everyday Chicagoan. Another goal of mine is to see the differences in culture between the two and find the similarities that might make the adjustments to living in the U.S. a little easier. If the family has children I think they can truly benefit from having someone who has grown up in the city that they have been placed in.
I do have some fears when it comes to meeting my refugee family and it goes along the lines of my social ineptitude but I think having an open mind and growing up with a family who also wasn’t from the U.S. can help break down some differences and some shared experiences can bring my partner and I closer to our family. Offending my family is also a fear of mine but again having an open mind and really understanding their culture can go a long way in preventing such situations.
I also expect and am curious to learn about my family’s specific refugee experience. I hope it intrigues me and also motivates me to share their experience with others in order to pass down knowledge and maybe even motivate others to join in this necessary cause. I also would like to learn more about the refugee programs in the U.S and around the world so we can build a better program that can bring more refugees to safe zones annually. Learning this can also help us better our techniques in assimilating refugees to their new homes.
In conclusion I am excited and nervous to meet my refugee family but I am also proud to be a part of a great opportunity that allows me to meet new people from different places and be able to learn from their experiences. I look forward to working with my partner and my refugee family this semester and hope I can really make a positive lasting impression on them while helping them learn about our culture as well as learning about theirs.

I don’t believe that anyone could really say that they started participating in resettlement without having some misconceptions about the role that they would be playing or the people they would be working with. Throughout this semester, I’ve had to reevaluate my own thinking multiple times, my expectations having been proven wrong one by one. The first time that I was forced to do this was when I realized that I’d actually gotten involved with resettlement for some of the wrong reasons. In my first reflection paper I talked about joining up for a chance to expose myself to other cultures without ever having to leave Chicago. Although there’s nothing wrong with being curious, I was being naive in thinking in thinking that I wouldn’t have to put my all into this program in order to do right by the family that I was paired with. Indeed, even if I did put everything I had into my volunteer time this semester, I still don’t think I would have been fully up to the task of making my family feel at home. I think that this class has helped to teach me that I can’t be the recording observer in everything I do. Sometimes I will have to break down the distance between myself and others. I still don’t fully believe that I was able to put everything that I could have into this important program, but I plan on continuing to participate in resettlement this summer, armed with the knowledge that I’ve gained over the last three months.
Believing that I could maintain an observer’s mentality over the course of the semester was not my only mistake. After some consideration, I’ve discovered that I’m also guilty of generalizing about refugees to a certain extent. As was discussed in Safe Haven, refugees are extremely varied and unique people; by labeling them all simply as refugees, we define them only by the bad things that have happened to them, and not by who they are inside. No two refugees are exactly the same, and all of them have the need to be recognized as individuals. I believe that there were some ways in which I failed to do this at times, but I overall I feel pretty good about the way that I felt about my family over the course of the semester.
I used to believe that most of the problems that refugees faced in rebuilding their homes could be solved by asking the government to put more effort into mitigating the financial struggle that most refugees go through during their time here. I can see now that I was wrong, at least in part. The government will never be able to provide everything that a refugee family requires to rebuild home. Although it is obvious that refugee resettlement programs go severely underfunded, it is doubtful that advocating for an increase in the amount of welfare refugee families receive will do as much good as one might think. Concerns about the bloated U.S. budget will make passing any laws of this nature rather difficult, and in the end if private individuals think they’re already solving the problem through their taxes, then they’ll be less apt to get involved on a more personal level. The task of rebuilding home is far too unique to the individual to ever rely on the federal government to do it properly. The answer, at least for now, probably lies with the private citizens who decide to give their time and energy to the cause. Volags already do a considerable amount of work, but the difficulty of that work could be mitigated by raising awareness and convincing people to get involved in refugee resettlement. It is recommended that we encourage people to volunteer, as those volunteers will generally be crucial in making the refugees feel at home in their new world.
People, especially in America, tend to abide by the phrase, “out of sight, out of mind”. Even though citizens should always be encouraged to contribute monetarily to the cause, sometimes people throw money at notable issues so they can feel good about themselves and gain some temporary peace of mind. By encouraging people to get involved with this cause for an extended period of time, people will be able to do greater service while also enriching themselves with valuable experience and contact with people who are generally pretty amazing. Three of my close friends who attended the Rebuilding Home simulated camp have told me that they plan on getting involved with the refugee resettlement program this summer. I can only hope that they have an even better experience than I have thus far.
It is also advised that the volunteers who do decide to get involved with these programs make an effort to teach people to want to learn about other cultures, but make sure they know that refugees are more than just a group of interesting people from faraway lands. They are unique individuals who do not wish to be labeled and put into boxes based solely on the hardship that they’ve gone through. In addition to fostering the same general curiosity that I possessed at the start of the semester, volunteers could also work to dispel some of the same simple misconceptions that I was struggling with at the same time.
As volunteers and service workers begin to raise awareness about this important cause, the responsibility for teaching people about why it is important to get involved will spread to many other groups of people. In a perfect world, teachers and professors will continue to take the stance that everyone has a personal responsibility to help those worse off than themselves. By teaching people to set aside their egos and their ethnocentrism, people will certainly become more interested in doing their part to help their fellow man. People should also be encouraged to view those people from other parts of the world as no less diverse, complex, and unique than themselves.

I have always considered myself to be very, very lucky. Considering, even briefly, all the times and places in which I could have come into being, I cannot help but feel that my life has afforded me with opportunities that I neither deserve, nor fully appreciate. Having never lived a life of poverty, I don’t think I can even come close to understanding what other people in this world go through on a daily basis. That said, I may not ever be able to see the world through their eyes, but such a fact would never keep me from trying. I would be thoroughly embarrassed to look back on my life in forty years to see that I never used my interest in learning or my surplus of opportunity to make the lives of others just a little bit better.
My upbringing has been rather insular. I was raised in a heavily Christian family, and I went to public school in a town where upwards of ninety percent of people would have fallen into the white, upper-middle class demographic. My family was not as well off as some others, but both my parents believed fiercely in doing their part to help the community, generally through youth sports or child care. I suppose that I inherited some sort of sense of responsibility from them. To be fair, I was never really that involved in my community growing up. I just wanted to get out and see the world. In fact, I’d say that trying to learn about the world is still one of the primary reasons I love anthropology. I’ve never had the money or spare time to get out of the country, or even move throughout it properly. I satisfied my urge to know more about other people and social groups through reading books and taking classes, mostly, but I’ve always known deep down that one can’t learn everything just by reading about it. That’s why, when the time came to sign up for classes this year, I decided that it would be prudent to get as much real world experience as I could, without worrying about coming up with the funds to support a world tour. Refugee Resettlement seemed like a good fit for my goals, and, perhaps even more importantly at the time, it seemed like a good fit for my schedule.
I came into this class with very little prior knowledge of the refugee experience. It would probably be safe to say that the refugees I knew the most about were the Cherokee, among others, who were forced to move west of the Mississippi by the U.S. Government. I was, of course, aware that many people in other parts of the world were forced to adopt refugee status due to religious or political persecution, but I had never done any research on the subject.

21 January 2013
Reflection Paper 1
Eleanor Roosevelt once said that, “The purpose of life is to live it, to taste experience to the utmost, to reach out eagerly and without fear for newer and richer experience.” Over the next three months I am not sure what to expect from my upcoming experiences with the refugee family that I will be assigned to assist. Yet, I am about to step into a world that is not all too unfamiliar to me. Throughout my life immigration has had lasting impacts; it is through the struggles and hardships of past immigrants that I am alive today. My grandfather left Yugoslavia in the early 1950’s to find a better life in Germany. It was there, as a young Croatian man that he met my grandmother, went to medical school, and then had my mother. After years of living in Germany he took his medical degree to the United States military, using it as a way to eventually gain citizenship and later move to the United States. He went on to save many people’s lives as a surgeon, and taught me how hard work and focus can change your life.
It is from growing up with my grandparents speaking different languages, eating different foods, and enriching my life with a different culture that has made me excited to assist a refugee family this semester. As Mary Pipher stated in her book The Middle of Everywhere, “We can learn from the refugees among us how to deal with our fears and sorrows. Our newcomers have experienced panic, loss, disruption, and vulnerability” (Pipher xii). Although she is referring to the attacks on 9/11 and how refugees from other countries have also experienced events that have shaken their understanding of the world, refugees can help us understand much more about ourselves as well. They are people that have grown up in different areas of the world, with different cultures and ways of thinking. Refugees each have their own stories with lessons that can be learned, and where the harsh realities of our world are made apparent. I am excited to learn from them and see how I can relate to their different experiences, as well as learn from the different trials and hardships they have been forced to undertake.
Working in any anthropological field, especially when you are assisting refugees, your actions and the way you are perceived has its own consequences. This has led me to feel slightly anxious about the current semester assisting a refugee family. As I will soon find out, I may appear even more “weird” or “unusual” to them as they may seem to me. The way I speak, the way I dress, and even the different habits that I am not even aware of may make them feel uncomfortable. I am slightly worried that what may be perceived as unusual habits or actions may even alter their view of Americans, and their new home in the United States. The potential language barrier is another trial that I will possibly have to overcome. The fact that I am fluent in only English will probably make the initial meetings slightly uncomfortable or even confusing for all parties involved. Yet I understand that these families have the desire to learn English, so hopefully I will be able to be a helping hand when it comes to their learning of the English language.
Yet among all of the mixed emotions, I believe that this will be a fun educational experience that has the potential of changing my life and the way I view the world. I am happy to be able to help a family come to terms with their new reality, and I believe that this is something that more people should try and do. It helps us understand something that many have little understanding of, that is refugees and immigration. Especially at a time now where congress is discussing different plans for immigration reform, it is important to keep in mind the people that the policies are directly affecting. Mary Pipher discussed how the cultural walls that had once separated peoples in different countries are slowly being broken down, as “the world community is small and interconnected. We are living in one big town” (Pipher xiii). We must understand and realize that the world we live in today is changing, and together we must be ready for what lies ahead. So this semester I go forth, more excited than anything else, ready for the experiences that await.

Anth 301: Refugee Resettlement
Second Reflection Spring 2013

Albert Schweitzer once said, “In everyone’s life, at some time, our inner fire goes out. It is then burst into flame by an encounter with another human being. We should all be thankful for those people who rekindle the inner spirit.” These human beings that we encounter are known as friends. They are the individuals that stand by us in our time of need, those who help us when we have fallen down, and it is true friendship that many believe to be the positive difference in someone’s life. Unfortunately not everyone has the luxury of friendship, especially refugees who have been thrust into a new world with an unfamiliar language, strange customs, and a place where you have no friends to rely on. These displaced persons are forced to start a new life and embark on a journey to find their new home
Mary Pipher reflected in her book The MIDDLE of EVERYWHERE, “…Noora jumped up, clicked her heels together, and recited Dorothy’s speech. I laughed and clapped but felt a twinge of sorrow at this young Kurdish Dorothy looking for home” (Pipher 85). Refugees in the United States are in their third stage/ phase of the “Refugee Life Experience Phases,” that of rehabilitation or resettlement. They have been persecuted and have had to leave their homes, sometimes forcefully. Refugees have lived in exile for some matter of time, having had a major part of their identity, their citizenship, stripped away from them. Whether or not the refugee family has had a more difficult, or a less challenging experience, they have been given a fresh start in a new country. In this instance I worked with a Burmese family that had recently been placed in an apartment in Rogers Park. They arrived in the United States on January 23rd and over the past few weeks my ANTH 301 group has attempted to help them find their “Kansas.”
The name I will use for the refugee family I am working with will be “the Rogers Family”. When the Rogers arrived in the United States they had little understanding of the English language as not one of them spoke a single word. I was to be introduced to the family on February 3rd, but unfortunately there was a miscommunication and after waiting for nearly two hours the family did not show up. As I arrived at their apartment on that first day I was excited, yet slightly anxious. I had already heard stories from other classmates about their encounters with their refugee families, as well as some of the readings from the Pipher book. Would my experience be similar to that of the Kurdish sisters in chapter two of Pipher’s book, or because the Rogers Family had four children would I expect an experience similar to that of the ELL students in chapter five; a group of young and joyful children who used the classroom as a medium to cope with the struggle of their everyday lives.
One week later my group returned to the apartment for our introduction. It was another clear and sunny winter day in Chicago. The harsh wind and snow had subsided and given way to a slightly warmer day with temperatures barely reaching fifty degrees. Although some of the initial excitement had waned after the week before, the beautiful weather seemed to signal a successful first day with the Rogers family. The family was located in a multicultural/ multiethnic neighborhood. As I climbed up the steps I saw Arabic on a few of the doors and could hear what proved to be the family of another South East Asian country across the hall. As you enter the lobby of the apartment complex you see two doors. The door on the left was the door that would take us to the Rogers family. The case worker showed us the proper way to slip one’s hand through an empty hole in the frame that once held a square window (6 x 6 inches) and reached for the handle. Three floors later and we arrived at the Roger’s apartment.
As we reached the door I remembered a story from Pipher’s book in chapter six, where she works with a high school ELL class. She wrote how the ELL students saw the American students as ignorant and rude, and unfortunately from the sound of the stories they were not far off (Pipher 184 – 185). Yet as I entered into the apartment with an open mind and ready for anything I was greeted by a shy yet happy family. The Rogers were a family of six: the mother (Lisa), the father (Peter), three daughters (Christina, Mary, and Leyla), and the son (Steven). All the names given are pseudonyms to keep the family anonymous. Unfortunately the ECDC (one of the two organizations partnering with the class), for whatever reason, was not able to get us a translator for our introduction. From what we had been told the family had been contacted and notified of our intentions as students who were there as representatives of the organization. We awkwardly used our hands to indicate who we were and attempted to relay the purpose for our visit. The first day proved challenging as we resorted to teach them some English beginning with objects in the apartment and then colors. About an hour passed and the family began to grow tired. As we left we agreed that working on English would be our focus and we began to create a plan for the following Sunday.
The next week we arrived with a dry erase board and flash cards. We began by reviewing the words from the previous week and moved on to the alphabet, numbers, and then back to objects that were in the room. We left after that meeting still not feeling quite pleased with the results. The third week we arrived with the same dry erase board and flash cards, but in addition we brought a laptop that displayed a “Burmese for beginners” workbook. Using the Burmese sentences we were able to communicate more effectively. It seemed as if we had finally made some progress. We would use the basic questions, first having a member of the family read it to the group, and then ask them in English. They finally began to understand the questions and seemed to improve as the day went on. The family had seemed to become much more relaxed in our presence as we laughed and played the word games. There was even a moment when we were getting up to leave when the eldest daughter Christina told us to stay and eat as she brought out what appeared to be Thai grapes and orange cola. As we sat there eating we seemed to finally be able to experience without having to worry about language. We listened to music for a short time and attempted to ask questions. The day came to an end, and as we walked to the bus stop there seemed to be a new energy within us; we finally felt as if we may actually be making a difference.
As the past few weeks have gone by I have tried to compare my experiences with that of Mary Pipher. Unfortunately I believe that it is too early in my service to make any definitive calls. Pipher does seem to romanticize refugees as her eloquent writing draws the reader in. Yet I was surprised to see what incredible relationships she was able to forge with so many different groups. From the Kurdish sisters to the ELL elementary class that she took fishing, she seemed to be able to befriend and sometimes help these people. Considering my group has to overcome a much larger language barrier I believe that our journey with the refugees will take a little bit longer.
Again, due to the language barrier I feel that I have little evidence to support the importance of befriending. The Behnia article that we read in class covered many of the problems of befriending. I do not believe that my group is experiencing many of those problems. The only one that has been an issue is the language barrier, which may in fact be hiding many of the underlying problems. The lack of communication makes it much more difficult to get an accurate reading of situations. Most of the time the family is extremely helpful and cooperative, yet that may just be them saving face, in order not to offend the group. As the sessions continue and their understanding of the English language continues to grow, it will be interesting to see what happens.

April 29, 2013
Reflection Paper 3
My entire life I have attempted to expand my knowledge, to avoid the stain of ignorance, to make educated decisions, and abstain from making assumptions. I believed that through my past, through the anthropology classes I had taken, and through my understandings of the world I had created an accurate conception of refugees in our world. I imagined a friendly people, those who were joyful for a new opportunity, a people that were open and excited to be in the United States. I believed refugees to be able to overcome adversity, to conquer the obstacles that they would surely face in the United States, and above all I believed them to be independent and I expected their assimilation into the United States to come easily to them. In addition I expected a cold welcome awaiting them in the United States, what with our roots of racism and ambivalence towards those of different races, religions, and nationalities. Yet I had failed to take into account the other factors and challenges that they faced. Refugees in the United States struggle with their identity especially when it comes to kinship and family structure, and that there are those in the United States that are willing to help and welcome refugees into their new world.
As Haines argues in his book Safe Haven, “a refugee must also meet the expectations for being a ‘good’ immigrant” (85). They are pressured into fitting in, and assimilating in to what it means to be an American. Yet ethnicity for the most part, unlike race, is something that is self-imposed and is usually based off of a person’s beliefs and values (Haines 86). Even the definition of ethnicity in the United States may vary from that of the individual, and ethnicity can also change over time. Individuals may see their religion as their ethnicity associating themselves as a “Christian” or “Jew” (Haines 96). Refugees are also known to use nationality or even race as an identifier of ethnicity. There is an overlap in the United States between ethnicity and other forms of identity, such as race, religion, and nationality. This shows that there are some different interpretations and even understandings of how refugees in the United States identify themselves.
The structure of the family and even ideas of kinship vary across borders, creating challenges for refugees in the United States. These ideas of kinship carry over to the United States and can affect their lifestyle. For instance, Hmong and Vietnamese families extend into what is considered the community, intensifying the importance of the unity of the community. “This is particularly so for the Hmong and helps explain how they can continue quite traditional patterns of mass migration even after arrival in the United States – and why they are sometimes more proactive in community organization and action” (Haines 114). Yet in contrast the Lao and Khmer have small nuclear family households similar to those in the United States, creating a community that “complements family life rather than being a direct extension of it” (Haines 114). Another problem that refugees face is the fact that entire families are not always able to make it to the United States, some have already perished in the struggles the families had previously undergone. Sometimes wives are left without a husband, and even some children are forced to undergo the journey alone, finding themselves adopted by Americans.
The effects of household structure can affect families in many ways. The most important is the economic benefits that can be reaped. Social groups with larger households benefit from having more wage earners, taking some of the economic pressure off of the few that would normally support the larger family (Haines 116). Variation in the household, especially age, is a factor that can cause problems within the household. Younger children have a less difficult time assimilating into the new culture and it can put them at odds with parents, and especially with the elderly. The older the refugee is, the more difficult it is to adapt and learn a new culture and language. This causes many of the elderly to isolate themselves, at times causing depression and additional stress on the family.
Depression is something many refugees are all too familiar with, as their past in the United States has been nothing short of devastating. “It is a universal story of loss, hope, and a new life, but also a narrower story of one particular country’s history of both providing and refusing refuge” (Haines 169). From the removal of the Indians, to the refusal of the St. Louis, to the disregard of the Rwanda Genocide in the 90’s, the history of the United States’ relationship has been a trail of blood and tears. Today the United States can be viewed as a country that has undergone a change of heart. It brings in more refugees than any other country, and is a large contributor to the UNCHR. Yet, with millions of refugees still out in the world the government has not done enough. To their credit a dragging recession has hindered the economy and placed moral issues in the back of the voter’s mind, the U.S. being a Democracy can create that dilemma.
The first thing the United States can do is allocate more funds to the refugee program. As much money as there is, very little has been attributed to the refugees that are in need of the assistance. Two major sources of that money are the defense budget, as well as the governments burdening welfare crisis. The defense budget in the United States is the largest of all the countries in the world. Closing down a few foreign bases, or even one less nuclear submarine could be enough to help the thousands of refugees that are resettled in the United States every year. Yet another burden on the U.S. economy is its welfare program. The argument here is not that welfare should be done away with, but in the United States it is a very inefficient system where hundreds of billions of dollars are being used. Just a small fraction of that could also end up being extremely helpful in supporting the resettlement of refugees in the United States.
Money is an important factor in refugee resettlement, yet it is not the only one. The United States looks at refugees as part of their political game. They weigh acceptance of refugees by ideology, a moral responsibility, and slightly by the concerns of the international community (Haines 4 – 6). In the past the United States promoted itself as anti – communist, taking in those who were willing to escape from the “oppressive” communist regimes and accept democracy as their savior. The Vietnam War displaced millions of people as the United States government sent troops and bombed villages, making it their responsibility to take in those they had been responsible for. Lastly the UNHCR as well as pressure from other states has had some impact on the United States’ refugee resettlement program. Today it can be argued that the United States has maintained these policies, yet it has taken the form of anti – terrorism. The United States needs to reevaluate and rethink the processes and the ideological requirements behind the acceptance of refugees. They need to be seen as human beings who are in dire need, rather than political pawns on the chess board.
Volunteer organizations (Volags) in the United States are extremely helpful in the resettlement of refugees in the United States. Their organization and ability to settle refugees so quickly has proven to be extremely useful, positively affecting millions of refugees over the years. Yet the organizations suffer from many setbacks. They are given very little funding to support the refugees, yet the government does have certain requirements for Volags: pick – up from airport, apartment placement, 1 hour cultural orientation, health screening, school enrollment, ESL, and job referrals. I believe that the problem lies within the federal regulations. If the government better regulated and put more of an emphasis on the refugee resettlement program then it would also place more money within the department. It may cause more stress on the Volags but it would also hold them more accountable, and give them more resources to create even better refugee resettlement programs.
When I think back on my previous misconceptions of refugees in the United States, I find that I have made the mistake of making generalizations as well. Refugee is a word that has been used to associate with a group of people; millions upon millions of people. They are a diverse group of individuals that come from different backgrounds, cultures, and experiences. There is no way to generalize or categorize refugees in the United States, and that is where the problem lies. The government and Volags create programs and attempt to set standards for people who many of which have little to nothing in common. In the end it is going to take more than the government to change the refugee system in the United States. The only way that the government will change is if the constituency that puts those people in power, realizes the magnitude and the devastation that the refugees in the world face. It is up to us, we the people, to change our world, and it begins with educating ourselves. Unfortunately the future for refugee resettlement in the Unites States looks bleak. With tensions increasing in the Middle East and North Korea, as well as the recent attack at the Boston Marathon, refugees will have to stay strong now more than ever before.

Bibliography
Haines, David W. Safe Haven?: A History of Refugees in America. Sterling, VA: Kumarian, 2010. Print.

Reflection 3

            If someone approached me six months ago and asked what I know about the refugee situation in my community, I would confidently reply that I know very little and have no awareness of their presence in Rogers Park. That was certainly the case when Dr. B first introduced me to his work with refugees of the area. Startling at first, issues of their resettlement however became ordinary to me as my experience grew. Fortunate in my immersion into the life of a family from the Ivory Coast and observing its extraordinary culture, I have met some of the most amazing people and have come to battle any preconceptions I have had at the beginning. Reflecting back on this amazing opportunity, I have narrowed my observations to conclusions that cultural adjustment varies on an individual basis but reflects a range of social and economic factors, that ethnic communities play an important role in, and that befriending programs succeed in their goals yet continuous improvements within the VOLAGS are needed to make up for the dynamism of refugee resettlement.

One of the major things that struck me as it was contradictory to my expectations was how widely cultural adjustment varies among members of a family. My Western ideologies led me to assume that faced with the equal opportunities, anyone can succeed and make something of their life. However, as I have come to learn more about my family, I realized this was not the case, and the level of adjustment varies directly with simple demographic characteristics like age or gender (Haines 30).In fact, children adapt more quickly whereas elders are less prone to full integration and more towards isolation. This latter option seems to be more prevalent among the youngest of refugees whose way was paved by their parents, uncles, and aunts. Their language competency for instance is obtained more quickly, which only further allows them to acclimatize effortlessly to the new surroundings (33). Additionally, as I gathered throughout my multiple conversations, adults young or middle in age exhibit a practice of adjustment that is of a bi-cultural blend. As David W. Haines states in his book Safe Haven: A History of Refugees in America:

They are no longer operating in an unknown environment, but rather trying to access traditional goals, to utilize this new environment to meet these goals, and often to modify those goals in the light of changed circumstances. (41)

Clear among young to middle-aged adults, this unique tolerance led them to realize they have no intentions on going back in the nearest future and accept this new socio-economic environment they found themselves in. Particularly at this age, additional factors such as prior occupation and their human capital vastly contributes toward a successful cultural adjustment (31). Nevertheless, this complexity of adjustment came as surprising but leads me to believe that despite fully integrating, they are capable of becoming quality members within their community.

Another aspect that surprised me as imperative toward successful resettlement of refugees was the presence of an ethnic community. Working with a family that does not have an opportunity to live within a community of their own kin made me realize how important it must be for one who is trying to start life anew. A sudden isolation from fellow countrymen and all else associated with it such as advice, entertainment or even cuisine makes the refugee experience much more complicated. As Haines points out in his work:

The economic expansion of an immigrant enclave, combined with reciprocal obligations attached to a common ethnicity, creates new mobility opportunities for immigrant workers and permits utilization of their past investments in human capital. (43)

However, one of the strongest attributes of the refugees I worked with was the family itself. All of its members developed a strong connection between each other that it would be safe to presume that having a large, supportive family could substitute an absent ethnic community. In fact, Haines proposes just that. He says families “furnish a sense of belonging and the basis for a positive self-identity, as well as making contributions to the economics of a new life in America” (43).Being surrounded by relatives thus greatly contributes to refugee success at assimilation. Further, it also shows how significant is a correct choice of who should become a refugee.

The final conclusion I have arrived after finishing my experience of befriending refugees was that programs like these accomplish their goals but continuous improvements are needed to make up for the dynamism of refugee resettlement. With the aid of these programs refugees more quickly overcome the culture shock and begin to show clear signs of independence (41). These programs also contribute to dispelling myths about refugees and are an unmistakable sing of showing support to new comers. However, among other institutions, the VOLAGS need to continually adjust to the continually accommodate for the ever changing refugee demographics. Additional help and resources are needed during the second phase of refugee adaptation where health, housing, education, and employment remain problematic. On tops of that public policy of time affects how refugees and their needs are perceived. It is therefore crucial for the VOLAGS to advocate for and receive more resources that will allow a more appropriate response in the face of a constantly growing refugee population.

After six months of working with my refugee family, I have concluded that cultural adjustment varies on an individual basis but reflects a range of social and economic factors, that ethnic communities play an important role in, and that befriending programs succeed in their goals yet continuous improvements within the VOLAGS are needed to make up for the dynamism of refugee resettlement.

Finding themselves “midway to nowhere” (44) but extremely strong and independent individuals they are, refugees depend on volunteer support from their communities. It is only through exposure of their issues are we able to understand what these people went through and how great they are. Therefore in order to help, we must first make the effort to understand them.

The disadvantages that refugees face affect the course of their longer-term adjustment to the United States, making their frequent successes more impressive and their difficulties more understandable. (41)

Works Cited

Haines, David W. Safe Haven?: A History of Refugees in America. Sterling, VA: Kumarian, 2010. Print.

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Reflection 2

Will We (Be)friends?

            As a complete novice, I anticipated almost every possibility but expected very little from the first meeting with my family of refugees. To be completely frank, I did not even know what to expect. With no past experience and knowing little about what I am immersing myself into, it was a hugely poignant experience that demanded a broad leap of faith. Among a multitude of other worries, our ability to communicate and understand each other appeared to be most frightful obstacles I was anticipating. Although looking back at this silly inauguration, I wonder how I in no way contemplated the other side of the coin, that is the family’s perspective on me. It never crossed me to question whether they will approve of and accept an outsider into their household and vice versa. From the beginning, I unconsciously treated this experience as a mutual relationship – a support system, in which my partner and I will help the refugee family at adjusting to a new society. Only after a few weeks, have I discovered the concept of befriending and realized that my approach has partially resembled it proving it effectiveness in refugee interactions.

The very characteristic of friendship as we know it lies in the voluntary nature of it. When meeting new people, it is only the genuine feelings that are appreciated and noticed in relation between two people. A premonition of friendship as an imposed relationship then seems strange to any person under any circumstance (Behnia 16). “Another characteristic of friendship is commitment into the future” (16). People establish friendships with an intention of to keep contact for years and sometimes for a lifetime. In comparison, a concept of befriending is quite opposite and does not resemble any pillars of friendship. Foremost, befriending is an arranged relationship between subject and volunteer. As an aftermath of refugee acclimatization to new society, these relationships are established to ease the transition for the newcomers. Secondly, befriending is a time-limited relationship. By its very nature, volunteers are independent to move on irrespective of involvement. Lastly, whereas friendships are erected between people of similar status, befriending is an asymmetrical relationship. In such case, one party seeks assistance whereas the other is to offer it. All of these thus paint a clear distinction between friendship and befriending. Consequently, to realize that my approach indicated concept of befriending seemed quite surprising as not to say disturbing. I presume my worries about communication and understanding each other were typical of befriending experience in sense that they focus at maximizing benefits and transparency of the relationship.

Nevertheless, whether it is plausible to argue morality of befriending, to consider it simulated companionship is a trivial understatement. Regardless of individual opinions, befriending emerges as the most efficient method at assisting refugees upon arrival in a new country. By establishing certain rules and restriction in the interaction between volunteer and subject, greater amount of individuals will accept the conditions of befriending. In other aspects, it allows for more freedom for decision and actions on part of the volunteer by protecting his or hers recognized rights as a volunteer. In my personal experience but with utmost humbleness, I notice how beneficial and important our work is. Besides the obvious of bringing us greatest joy, we notice how individual family members gain by meeting with us. Anywhere from helping with homework, assisting at talking to employer or simply spending time playing board games and exploring the map of the world, the family seems to enjoy our company. “The literature indicates that befriending programs improve health, increase levels of happiness, reduce the effects of social isolation, and cause the remission of depression (3). At the same time, it must be remembered that the likelihood of so many volunteers working would be decreased if the concept of befriending were not adapted. Despite the fact two entities are at different asymmetrical statuses or relationship is time-limited, befriending programs maximize volunteer outreach.

Following a period of transition, the experience of working with a refugee family has been an astonishing privilege I am glad to have undertaken. It oscillated from a uneasy beginning to a genuine interaction between the family and me, which often can be argued against.  However, thank to the concept of befriending, I was able to slowly immerse into maximizing my abilities at serving my refugee family.

Works Cited

Behnia, Behnam (2008) An Exploratory Study of Befriending Programs with Refugees: The Perspective of Volunteer Organizations. Journal of Immigrant & Refugee Studies 5(3): 1-19

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Reflection 1

            Immersion into new experiences is always exciting but also bears a certain level of uncertainty and foreboding. However, one thing is immersing oneself into an adventure and another when the experience involves working with other human beings. In such case, the degree of emotions elevates dramatically. This then closely represents my feelings before starting the work with the refugees.

Despite it being my first experience with refugee families, it will not be the only encounter I have had working with individuals that at first seem to be total strangers. Lately, specifically during my college years, I have been a volunteer at various clinics and hospitals having the privilege to shadow doctors and sometimes even play the role of an language interpreter between patient and physician. I think this however will be different. I will be meeting and crossing these people’s thresholds, entering a space that is not neutral in any sense and revolves around their individual rules and customs. I imagine that what seems normal at my or my friends’ homes would not be so obvious where I will be visiting the families. In that sense, I very much share Mary Pipher’s feeling during her first visits. “I wasn’t quite sure how to talk or touch, what behavior was appropriate in what settings, and when I might inadvertently offend” (Pipher 16). However, I will simply have to wait and see and enter the experience with a clear, open mind. At the same time, the encounter I am so privileged to experience is an experience of service. I will not be spending time with the family just to have some content to write into my reflection paper or receive a good grade in class. Just to quote Pipher again, “I didn’t want to turn anyone’s life into an anecdote” (15). Her words seem like a very powerful statement, one that has real texture, real meaning behind it, one that explains the initial trepidation.

At the same time however, along with all this caution and uncertainty, I feel a certain level of excitement to meet my refugee family. I can only imagine that I will be able to bring out a lot of positive experience from interacting with these individuals. I think it will be a humbling encounter that will reveal facets of my life I have not noticed yet. As Mary Pipher wisely points out in her book The Middle of Everywhere: “Refugees talk about contrasts … Looking at America through the eyes of the refugees, I have seen a very different America than the one I’ve inhabited for fifty years” (20). I wish I would be able to come to similar conclusions after my encounters with the family. Never having a chance to meet one yet, I assume refugees are people of great strength. Events they have gone through and reality they face might put all of our problems into perspective where as their resilience is only to be admired. At the same time, I hope that my efforts will be sufficient and useful for the family I will be working with.

The initial emotions I am experiencing prior to the beginning work with the refugee families can be largely explained as confounded. The mixture of foreboding and excitement is quite daunting. At the same time, it evokes a definite eagerness to begin meeting the family on the regular basis. With no prior acquaintance with refugees I enter this challenge on a clean slate, which can be a little tense but is certainly not discouraging. I understand that mistakes and misunderstandings will be made initilly but they cannot avoided, but only minimized. I hope however I will be able to look back and proudly say I made great friends from this experience. As Pipher puts it: “Giving never makes anyone poorer” (23).

Works Cited

Pipher, Mary B. “Hidden in Plain Sight.” The Middle of Everywhere: Helping Refugees Enter the American Community. Orlando, FL: Harcourt, 2003. 1-109. Print.

Final Response

            The time I’ve spent and will continue to spend with my refugee family this semester has been an unbelievably educating experience. I often find that in class discussions, reading and videos can only do so much for education in a subject. I believe hands on learning is the best teaching tool a professor has at their disposal and Anth 301 provided just that. Being able to see the things we talk about in class manifest in my work with my family ties the concepts to real life situations and experiences and I think that is the surest way to both remember and relate to them. I feel I have learned a lot about my family’s culture and background by getting to know them this semester and that compared to how I thought it would be, it was an overwhelmingly positive experience. I think I gained an impression in class that there was going to be a lot more negative situations than what I think I encountered in my work. I thought there would be constant post-traumatic stress, debt and healthcare issues. On reflecting on some situations I think some of these things exist within my family but they are much more subtle than I thought they would be from our in class discussions. While there are less negative issues associated with my volunteering than I thought there would be, there is no doubt that they are still present and are a byproduct of both the family’s past and the current state of affairs in the united states refugee resettlement programs.

            One of the concepts we kept coming back to in class was that the government and refugee resettlement agencies either weren’t or were incapable of doing enough. There is extreme stress put on these families right from the start. They have 4 months from their arrival to learn a language that takes years to master, have jobs and be self-sufficient. They have limited monetary support and I believe that the pace at which they are expected to acclimate is far too fast. The “self-sufficiency” policy that the US places on its refugees is setting up the majority to fail. That being said, I believe the reason that I haven’t seen some of the consequences of this system with my refugee family is because they were the lucky minority. Upon arriving they had family members present that were well established and helpful in the transition. Two of the working age males in the family acquired jobs within 3 months, one of which who is paid to work at home taking care of the families elderly grandmother. Their English has progressed quickly and steadily and they have a real strong work ethic to learn the language and culture. Some of the social isolation I saw in the beginning has all but vanished as they are frequently out and about before, during and after our weekly visits. I believe my refugee family has been extremely lucky to have not experienced more of the negative things we talked about in class. That being said, I don’t think things like money problems and healthcare are completely nonissue for them but they seem to be weathering them well compared to how I thought it would be from what we were told in class. While they are by no means privileged by the US refugee system, I don’t think they have experienced the worst of the flaws in its system.

There are many issues in the US refugee resettlement system but I believe the main flaw is money. Lack of adequate funding makes taking in, placing and supporting refugees in their first years in the US extremely difficult and leads to policies like “self-sufficiency” as discussed above. Lack of funding deals damage all the way down the refugee resettlement chain. There is less financial and healthcare aid and most importantly in my opinion, less opportunity for people like myself to get involved volunteering or working in the refugee resettlement process. Volunteer and non-profit agencies undertake a massive amount of work for little or no pay in the field that I think is most important in the resettlement process, hands on helping. The hands on work has benefitted my knowledge and outlook on the refugee resettlement situation and there is no doubt that it has done the same for my family. Befriending programs create a sense of belonging while creating a relationship from which refugees can benefit. English practice, job placement and financial, medical and social advice are all massively beneficial to refugee communities. I think with additional government funding more volunteer programs or even dedicated jobs could be created to get people directly involved in helping. Volags are responsible for placing and general assistance of refugee families but I think the reason they don’t do more is simply from lack of funding. I think through increased government funding the refugee resettlement program could do what it set out to do with a much higher success rate instead of creating difficult if not impossible situations for newly arrived refugees. Additional funding could set up and maintain both job and volunteer based befriending programs of which through my experiences this semester, I think help tremendously.

One of the most important things I have learned this semester through my refugee befriending work is that one individual has the ability to make a large impact in the lives of newly arrived refugees. When I first arrived I was a bit anxious and hesitant that I would have an effect on the family but now it is clear that we have mutually benefitted each other through the volunteer program. While there is still room for many improvements in the US refugee resettlement program, I think befriending programs like the one I experienced should be on the forefront of those improvements. There is no substitution for hands on assistance and I know refugee communities everywhere would benefit through more hands on work from volunteers and professionals alike.

Mid Semester Response

            When I signed up for Anth 301 I knew it was going to be a great experience both for me and the family I would be helping. So far this has proved to be true. As my first reflection paper indicates, I held a lot of anxiety and apprehension before beginning my volunteer work. However after meeting them and spending more and more time with them as the semester has progressed I am now very comfortable with our weekly meetings. It is quite astonishing to me to see the similarities and juxtapositions between what I thought would happen, what I was told would happen by Dr. Amick and what I read. All of these expectations, surprises and experiences have combined to make a really productive and enjoyable semester working with my refugee family.

            My personal expectations on our first visit were hopeful. I was hoping for an easy going but driven family that wanted to share their culture with me white learning American culture from us. Above all I wanted to teach and be taught. I was worried however that they may not be motivated to learn or interact with us and our time with them would be filled with awkward silences and crisscrossed signals coming from our lack of common ground on language and cultural norms. While there were and still are misunderstandings between us they don’t impede my ability to learn from or teach them. In so many ways the family has matched my expectations for this semester. They are a humorous, kind and above all hard working family that is eager to learn from us and adapt to their new home. The occasional out of place silence is more than made up for by the laughter, learning and socializing that we share on every visit. I have been able to teach them math, reading and writing and social skills all the while learning about their culture. They have taught me basic phrases in Napali and shared with me their native music, movies and stories. My “teach and be taught” expectation for the semester is being met every week. The only thing I was not expecting was how easy it would all be. I basically walked in, was open heartetly welcomed into their home and got right down to business. My work with the family so far has been extremely enjoyable and I look forward to continuing it this semester.

            At the time of our first visit we had not read all of the required readings assigned to us. Now however I am able to match several of my experiences to those in the readings. The first can be seen from the following quote from The Journal of Immigrant and Refugee Studies: “The literature indicates that befriending programs improve health, increase levels of happiness, reduce the effects of social isolation, and cause the remission of depression.” (P.3). While this quote was referring to the refugees health, happiness, reduction of social isolation and remission of depression I have found that not only do I think that I can see this effect in the family, but I know I can see it in myself. In my first response I indicated my tendency for an “introverted” personality. It is true that often times I like to be on my own and avoid social interaction. If it wasn’t for this class I wouldn’t have had the opportunity to break out of that comfort zone and improve the quality and conditions of my own life. I genuinely think that I am a happier, less stressed person due to the visits with the family. There is a Buddhist concept that goes along the lines of “to help yourself you must help others” and I think this effect can be seen in me. While it is easy to see the effects on myself I don’t think it is that narcissistic of me to think that I have had the same effects on them. They are always excited to see us when we walk in, demand to feed us dinner, are always eager to interact and allow us to play with their children. I am lucky enough to have been paired with Ellen Hamel who is near fluent in Napali and she often tells me that they can’t wait for us to come back and are eager to see us again. In the sense that we both have the ability to improve each other’s wellbeing and life there is no doubt in my mind that that my experience so far has followed the reading.

            While the life improvement for both groups would be an example of an experience I’ve had that followed the reading, something that doesn’t or I haven’t yet experienced would be the mistreatment and/or violence that many refugees experience. Through the stories Dr. Amick told us, the movie The Lost Boys of Sudan and the other readings (eg. P. 8-9 in Refugees as People) I was, perhaps foolishly, under the impression that all refugees were victims of horrible human rights abuses. I had mental images as all refugees as people who had undergone violence, extreme poverty and illness all while constantly on the run. While this still may be the case as perhaps they have neglected to share such experiences with us so far, I don’t get the sense that they have had to deal with PTSD, depression and the like that often results from those experiences. They have either kept this information from us, are extremely resilient people so as not to show any signs or symptoms or didn’t experience these types of atrocities. When I spend time with them I see a happy, healthy and close knit group of people. My instinct tells me that they didn’t go through these awful things but I am curious to learn more about their past as the semester progresses. I think that continually seeing the theme of violence and human rights abuses throughout many sources in the semester forged a misconception that hasn’t, or at least has not yet been, met by the family.

            I am enjoying my time with the family more and more as I see improvements in both their wellbeing and mine. The husband and “working age male” of the house recently got a job as a dish washer. The children are reportedly doing better in school and enjoy the lessons I give them. I see the families English improving every visit. Many of my personal and gained expectations from the readings and in class material have been met while some have not and maybe never will be. I feel as if I am really helping them with my volunteer service and they likewise are helping me.

 1st Response

While planning out my 2013 semester I realized I had a large hole in my schedule that needed to be filled. I looked around for classes but couldn’t find any that I liked or needed to take and then I stumbled upon Anthropology 301: Refugee Resettlement. After reading the course description and emailing Dr. A to gain permission to take his class I wondered what was in store for me. I have a rather introverted personality and the thoughts of having to do my service learning with a group of people that barely or didn’t speak English was and still is quite intimidating. How am I going to communicate with these people? Will I offend them accidentally? What if I can’t teach them anything? These and many other thoughts ran through my mind on the first day. After becoming acquainted and talking a bit in class however, Dr. A cleared up a lot of my questions without me even having to ask them. I realized how much refugees need programs and services like the volunteers through this class and that gave me a sense of belonging. Many of the stories he told described a very open and inviting group of people and while still hesitant, I am now excited to soon meet the people I’ll be helping this semester.

            The stories, lecture and card game we played on the first day of class really stuck with me. Dr. A laid a great foundation for how we would work with, and begin to understand the issues concerning refugees. The most heart wrenching part was hearing what a lot of these people have to go through. I come from a privileged, upper middle class family and have lived in America my entire life. I can’t imagine having to go through what some of these people do. Leaving my home, belongings and life behind in the blink of an eye to flee from violent conflict is not a concept many Americans are familiar with. I feel that I am guilty of taking that fact for granted by at times actively and purposefully ignoring things like this throughout my life because it is easier to shove it under the rug then get up and help. It’s easy to turn to the next page in the newspaper or change the channel on TV so you don’t have to face painful facts and images. The realization that I’ve had the ability to help people like this for most of my adult life and haven’t makes me kind of ashamed. The refugee simulation card game we played really struck this feeling home. I’m pretty sure I had it the worst in the class as I “died” 2^ce, instantly had all my possessions taken from me, was imprisoned and ended up with nothing by the end. Our group kept it light and joked around a bit but in the back of my mind I was thinking of how terrible it was that someone, somewhere went through that exact same situation for real while I sat in a warm classroom with a deck of cards. I question whether I could handle something that brutal and survive. As much hesitation, fear and anxiety I have about my coming work with these people I know for a fact that once I break the ice, I will have a great time and learn a ton. I have always believed that teaching doesn’t go one way. I may be teaching them English and basic life skills to adapt to their new home and environment but the things they will teach me about their culture, heritage and life experiences are literally priceless and I know that they will change me for the better. There is no doubt in my mind that “the refugee experience” builds perspective, wisdom and strength, all of which I am really excited to get to soak up and apply to my own life this semester.

            All the thoughts and things I have experienced so far in this class are just the tip of the iceberg. Dr. A said that this class changes people and I can already see the potential for that. I am excited to help and teach these people while changing and learning more about myself. At the time of writing this I probably have less than a week till I meet the family I will be with. I feel unprepared and a bit anxious but I’m fully ready to dive into this class and its experiences head on.

Closing Thoughts

As the semester comes to a close I find myself truly reflecting on my experiences over the past several months in Anthropology 301, Refugee Resettlement. Without a doubt I am extremely pleased with my decision to take this class. Beforehand I was unsure as to whether or not it would be something that would fit will with me and my life. To be completely honest, there were a lot of anxieties this class caused me and a lot of difficulties I faced throughout the semester. Overall, I am grateful for everything I encountered and experienced while taking this class.
I could not have been happier with the family I was paired with this semester. After the first couple visits, the mother of my family was calling me and my partner her sisters and telling us that her home was ours. It was completely heart warming and touching to be able to experience something like this and surprisingly enough, also be perfectly comfortable with it and to reciprocate the feelings. The down side to the pairing with my family is that we had some bad luck in terms of scheduling visits. More often than not there were issues in visiting due to conflicting schedules of three very busy people. This was sort of the hit or miss aspect of the class and we dealt with it all as best we could, being thankful for the time we did get to spend with the family.
Although I appreciated everything I learned in class to prepare me for this experience, I felt there were equal amounts of misconceptions that derived out of my preconceived notions going into everything. For example, everything about the strong connections and fun times we would have with the family was completely true and definitely experienced. Some misconceptions I had with my family definitely had to do with ideas of responsibility. In this case, I was not sure how my family would be in terms of finding a job and being proactive to get on their own two feet. Upon meeting them I instantly realized they were so incredibly eager to do so. I was also worried they would ask us for a lot of things we were not required to give them (as warned about in class) but luckily they were so independent and proud and only asked for our company.
Another thing we spent a lot of time talking about in class was the process refugees go through to actually come over to the United States. The background checks and security scans refugees encounter before they are approved to come to the United States are intense and numerous. David Haines author of Safe Haven writes about some of these difficult times in a refugee’s life. He says during the refugee’s exodus, “Loss of relatives and friends and of social context is virtually inevitable” (41). He also describes how it is really hard for refugees to assimilate and adjust because they are put into these homes that are made for them in neighborhoods where they often time have no chance of a familiar culture or small community. I thought about this a lot while I visited with my family. It really made me wonder how they could go through such traumatic, stressful experiences and still seem joyful. Luckily, they live in a nice, quiet neighborhood and already have other family members in neighboring towns.
It is difficult to say where this problem in relocating actually arises from. Unfortunately, it is hard to find a group of refugees whom the United States does not bring into the country without any sort of economic or political interest in mind. Of course, this is inevitable and the volags who actually work to resettle the refugees have no say in who is accepted and who is not. This also connects back to the type of community the volags create and place refugees into. They can only do so much and have such a limited amount of time to make a home for them that is affordable. As Haines says, “…location has often been less than ideal in terms of employment, schools, or even physical safety. Many refugee families have moved into high-crime areas because of their need for modest-cost, multi-bedroom, rental housing” (39).
These are just some of the many problems refugees face upon their arrival and beginning journey in their new home here. But these are some of the problems that are easiest for us to relate to because we have actually been to their homes and seen where they live and how they have been helped since they got here. We learned that a lot of refugees believe they are not receiving the proper help they need in order to succeed in their new life. However, from personal experience with the amazing refugees I have worked with through befriending and also ESL tutoring, there are definitely many great success stories of refugees which Haines includes in Safe Haven.
These refugees are people, just like us, who are all different. One thing I have definitely learned from this class is that although they all go through general similar situations that bring them here to the United States, these situations are also what make an individual who they are in terms of how it affects them and how they handle it. You cannot go into any work of befriending or ESL tutoring with preconceived notions or misconceptions of who you think this person will be and what they have been through. All we know are the stories we hear beforehand and you have to have an open mind and an open heart and be willing to actually get to know the individual and hear their story. The stories I have heard and the people I have met will undoubtedly stick with me for the rest of my life.

After a semester of learning about the complications faced at all stages of refugee resettlement and spending a few hours each week with a refugee family, I am left even less assured of how we should approach this situation than when I began this class. Considering the complexity of this issue, feeling overwhelmed is probably an appropriate reaction. My respect for people who devote their time to helping refugees has grown considerably and is second only to my respect for the refugees themselves who do their best to succeed in such an imperfect system. Unfortunately, after reading Haines (2010), it becomes apparent that there are no solutions that are simultaneously realistic, easy, and guaranteed to appeal to all parties involved.
First, the way refugees are represented requires improvement. While vilifying them is damaging, so is putting them on a pedestal, which I will admit I was guilty of doing at the beginning of this semester. Portraying refugees as survivors is not just a recent phenomenon (Haines 143) and it is not necessarily wrong to do so, but considering them heroic sets unfair expectations. Each member of my refugee family, for example, has undoubtedly survived far worse life experiences than I have, but they are just average human beings with their fair share of both virtues and flaws. This can also be seen in the positive publicity refugees received in Richmond, VA (Haines 62-69) where only characteristics Americans find admirable were emphasized. Although it is encouraging to see positive accounts of refugees, showing only the good is as dehumanizing and misleading as showing only the bad. Acknowledging the fact that these are real people in a complicated situation is necessary.
Another flaw is that, as Haines points out, interest in assisting refugees has depended largely on notions of ideology and responsibility (3). Unfortunately, I firmly believe that ideology is short-lived for the average person. It often lasts as long as a documentary is being played, but then forgotten once the concerns of daily life resume. This might be enough to get people to donate some money, but not necessarily enough to accept refugees into their own communities since this requires more of an effort. Responsibility is more complex, but if the average U.S. citizen feels that they are paying for the actions of their government then this can result in unfair resentment toward the refugees themselves. Whether fair or not, more emphasis should be placed on what refugees can offer the United States.
Unfortunately, any big changes need to be made at the level of the federal government. For example, considering economic self-sufficiency is a top priority, perhaps the federal government could somehow guarantee that a certain number of jobs each year will go to refugees. There is a long history of refugees being chosen specifically to fill the labor needs of the country of resettlement (Haines 13-14). This has obvious flaws as it biases refugee selection, but perhaps if the jobs were diverse or simple enough it would be a fairer system. While this affirmative action might generate resentment among U.S. citizens, if the conflict is inevitable due to a perceived competition for resources (Haines 57) taking a more direct approach would be the lesser of two evils. If some form of employment was guaranteed, then the pressure to learn English might not be as overwhelming either. When I listen to the children in my refugee family talking in their native tongue, it amazes me that they have managed to learn mine so well and so quickly. Their mother is not as skilled in English and her apparent lack of focus in learning the language can be frustrating, but I would imagine that being under so much pressure to learn makes this even more stressful.
Also, despite the fact that the U.S. prides itself on taking half of the refugees resettled each year, if we are simply setting these people up for failure taking fewer might be the wiser option. Unfortunately, the number we provide refuge to each year is small in comparison to the number of refugees still in camps, but until the ORR budget is raised, decreasing the number of refugees accepted each year and increasing the assistance each one receives would improve the chances of success in this country for the individuals who are resettled. Whether permanent resettlement or eventual repatriation is the ultimate goal, resettling refugees in the United States is a major social engineering project (Haines 7) and it requires a considerable amount of money per refugee.
This leads to the role of voluntary agencies. Overall, I genuinely believe volags are doing a remarkable job with limited resources. The befriending program in particular, while by no means perfect, provides a warmer reception for refugee families and allows U.S. citizens to put a face to this issue. I believe most U.S. citizens are more likely to have positive opinions of refugees when they are faced with an actual human being, and if more U.S. citizens became acquainted with refugees hostility would decrease. However, deciding to attend events or to become a befriender depends on the individual. Without some sort of incentive in place, such as the credit students in this class will receive for becoming befrienders, this interest is unlikely to occur. Also, in order to provide improved or new forms of assistance to refugees, more money is undeniably required.
In conclusion, refugee resettlement is an incredibly complex issue. While I wish I could think of improvements that could be made at the volag level, crucial improvements must first be made in public opinion and in policies governing refugee resettlement. Until public opinion has been swayed or more money is made available to resettle refugees, the effectiveness of volags will continue to be limited.

After several weeks of meeting with my refugee family, I have realized that a lot of my original anxiety was unfounded, and I have already learned some important lessons in the befriending process. The concerns that have proven baseless include not being able to get along with the family. I imagine most of my classmates feel the same way, but I consider myself extremely fortunate to get to know the family with which I have been matched. Another concern before meeting the family was how I should respond to being told of any of the hardships they experienced as refugees. This has not been an issue yet, because I have not had the chance to meet the father, the mother knows only a little English, and the children are all under the age of fifteen and seem far more interested in their present lives.
Probably the most important lesson I have learned in the first few weeks is that a good degree of flexibility is required. For example, one of my ongoing projects is teaching the youngest girl to count to one hundred. She had an assignment for class that included finding one hundred items from around her house and gluing them onto a piece of poster paper. I found out about this project the first day we visited them, had to explain to the family exactly what was required, and realized I would feel too awkward looking around their apartment for the necessary items. Before meeting with them a second time, I searched my own apartment for small items and found several buttons and small wooden shapes. I also bought a marker and a few pieces of colorful poster paper. By the next time we visited them, they had already completed the project. This reminded me of the story Dr. Amick told in class about worrying for an entire week about a problem one family was experiencing only to find out when he returned that they had already solved it themselves. Although I expected to spend most of that day helping her with this project, I ended up just letting them use the poster paper to draw on, and I used the marker to write numbers on the wooden pieces so that the youngest girl could learn to count by putting them in order. By remaining flexible, I was still able to accomplish what I had set out to do, which was help her with her counting skills. On other days, any previously made plans had to be abandoned completely.
However, although greatly outweighed by the benefits of volunteering, some of my original concerns remain. For example, one that I still have is how much I will actually be able to help the family. They are always extremely friendly, so I have never had cause to feel that I am being rejected as seems to occur occasionally with volunteers in befriending programs (Behnia 6). However, I do sometimes wonder if I am “inflicting help” (254) on the family as Mary Pipher feared she was in her experiences with the Kakuma refugee family. Sometimes when we get to their apartment, the family has guests over, the homework is all done, and the children are only interested in activities they could do without us such as playing soccer or going to the local library. In other words, I am there to help them, but they do not always appear to need or want the help I can provide. On the other hand, it is good to see that they have friends in the local refugee community, because from what I have read that is a good indicator of doing well in a new country. Also, it is good to keep in mind that doing things like playing or drawing with the children is arguably just as important a part of befriending as helping them with their homework.
Another possible limitation on my ability to truly help regards aspects of the befriending program itself. Although I honestly believe that both the family and the volunteer can benefit equally from this program, things are necessarily done at the volunteer’s convenience. For example, I am taking an active interest in the lives of these individuals for now, but due to what is happening in my own life I will only know them for the duration of this semester. From what I have read for this class, retaining befrienders is an ongoing problem, and I hate to think my leaving will cause the family to “lose a source of support and a relationship” (Behnia 11) however small my contribution to their lives may be. Obviously, this is much better than doing nothing for these families, and I imagine other students will be able to continue this work next semester, but it is an unfortunate aspect of an admirable program. Ultimately, all of these issues only strengthen my determination to find some way that I can really help the family in the time I have available.
So far, most of the time is spent assisting with homework. Even this can be tricky, because there are five children and giving each one the necessary amount of attention can be difficult. Although the children require a lot of attention, one of my main goals over this semester is to help the mother with her English, because she has expressed an interest in improving her skills in this language. During one of our visits, we took the mother and the children to the Lincoln Park Zoo. While this was mostly a matter of providing an enjoyable outing, I hope that it also introduced them to more of what Chicago has to offer. We also want to take them to the Field Museum, the Shedd Aquarium, or both. In order to give the family the option of going to these places in the future, we plan to teach at least the oldest son how to search for free days and how to get to these different locations. Teaching them how to incorporate these activities into their own lives if they are interested seems like a better idea than making these outings a type of occasional gift. It is also more in line with the practices advocated in class about enabling refugees to do things for themselves rather than doing things for them.
Overall, this has already proven to be a rewarding opportunity, but it does require some creativity in problem-solving. However, any problems I have personally come across during the befriending process have been minor, and I believe that the challenge of coming up with better ways of approaching different issues will make me a better friend for this family. The befriending process has been made much easier by the fact that the family is incredibly nice and it is a lot of fun spending time with them. The idea that I might be able to positively impact their lives in any way is also extremely fulfilling.

Going into this service-learning opportunity, I honestly have very little idea of what to expect beyond what was discussed during the first lecture. Judging from what I have already learned regarding the families that past students have assisted, I am approaching this with a mixture of excitement and nervousness, and both are in equal measure. Before this class, I knew almost nothing regarding the plight of refugees, but I am interested in learning more about this topic and actually helping refugees in a direct way. Although I do not yet have the details of the family I will be meeting, such as their country of origin or how many individuals the family is comprised of, I am really looking forward to meeting them and getting to know them over the next few months.
To be honest, I have a number of concerns regarding this opportunity. My main concern is that I will be of little assistance to the family I will be meeting with throughout this semester. However, I expect that after the first meeting I will have a better idea of what assistance they require and how I can personally help. Even if it is just a matter of talking about the United States or helping the children with their homework, I am determined to make myself useful. Another aspect of this service-learning opportunity that makes me nervous is that the family may have dealt with a number of other students over past semesters. I am worried that I will be a disappointment in comparison to previous students and the friendships they developed with the family.
Another cause for concern is the fact that from what I have already learned about refugees, their life experiences sound both extremely different and far more difficult than my own. While I would feel honored if any of them chose to share their experiences with me, my ability to relate to them would be limited. For a brief time during high school I volunteered in a program that helped immigrant children with their homework. One day I helped a young girl write a speech about her experiences, including watching her father get killed. Possibly because of her age, she was remarkably matter-of-fact about the entire ordeal, and I simply helped write the speech. If such an experience is shared during my time with a family this semester, I am afraid that all I can offer is a sympathetic ear.              However, I expect they will be more interested in talking about their present and future in the United States than talking about their past experiences.
Despite these concerns, I remain excited about the chance to get to know one of these families. As an anthropology major, this offers a great opportunity to interact with individuals of a culture with which I am unfamiliar. Equally exciting is that these individuals will need to know about the culture I grew up with, and I will be able to introduce them to more aspects of this culture. Although I realize that the point of this program is to help this family and teach them more about my culture, I really hope that this will go both ways and I will be able to learn about their culture as well. Another aspect of this opportunity that I find interesting is that I will be able to take a more active, personal role in assisting refugees. While such actions as donating clothing or money are invaluable, I will be able to really put a face on the issue of refugee resettlement due to the service-learning aspect of this course.
In conclusion, despite having mixed feelings regarding my ability to really be useful to a refugee family, I am excited to get the chance to try. Even if it is just a matter of being a friend in a mostly unfamiliar country, then I am happy to be that friend. If I can offer more concrete assistance as well, then I will gladly offer that assistance.

Paper I

I am very excited and anxious to begin my work with a refugee family sometime over the course of the next week.  I feel that this is an opportunity not only to expand my own horizons and meet people from a culture with which I probably would never get the chance to interact, but also to become someone who this family could rely on for help as they try to transition and understand the way of life in America.  I am excited at the thought that my partner and I will be contributing to the effort of making these people feel more at home in this strange new land they have been resettled to, and about helping them succeed by, for example, assisting them or their children with their English.  I wouldn’t say that I’m nervous or afraid of our first meeting; I look forward to the experience and even though I predict that there might be some awkwardness during our first meeting, I’m confident that it will be short-lived and we will get along just fine.  I realize there may be cultural differences and some things may get lost in translation but I feel that as long as I remain courteous, keep my eyes open for clues on proper conduct, and remain respectful, we shouldn’t run into any serious problems.

As of yet I have not been informed as to who my partner is and what family we have been assigned to, but the wait is only heightening my curiosity.  I wonder where the family will be from.  Are they a big family with many children of various ages, a small family with a child, or maybe a single parent?  How long ago where they forced to leave their homes and under what circumstances? When did they arrive in the United States and how do they like it so far? What is there story? How do they understand it all?

This thought that our interactions will lead to them hopefully revealing something about their past lives and hardships through stories, is something that I am very excited about.  As an immigrant from Central Europe I grew up Chicago in a very ethnic community made up primarily of Poles and other Eastern European peoples.  Surrounded by these people most of my life, I constantly was told the personally stories of each immigrant’s journey.  Most of these were stories about the various, oftentimes economic, push and pull factors that led them to give up their old life and seek a new one in America.  A few stories were about political activists who were forced to flee in order to avoid severe punishments of the then Communist regimes.  And still a few others described how the wars in the Balkans influenced their decisions in the early and mid-1990s.  But there was never a story of arriving in America as a refugee.  None of these people, no matter what they had faced living in Europe, had spent any time – let alone a quarter of their lives – living in a refugee camp or prison camp.  And for all of these Eastern Europeans, coming to America, had been their choice.

What I’m interested in is hearing the story of someone who had not chosen to leave his home and life, but rather was forced to under great duress only to end up in America years down the line.  I am interested in finding out how this refugee family perceives the country they were forced to flee today.  And perhaps if by the end of the semester we manage to forge a close enough relationship in which this question would not be seen as inappropriate, I would ask whether they ever dream of returning to their homeland.

I cannot stress enough how excited I am about starting my work with this family and am really proud that Loyola has developed a course in which we try to help a people who are often overlooked by society.  I am honored to be a part of this class, and to be given the opportunity to move away from analyzing the political or military side of crimes against humanity and to focus instead on the human face in these conflicts.

Paper II

Over the last three weeks my partner and I have been visiting a family from Burma which just arrived in the United States a little over two months ago.  The husband and wife live along with their five children in a small and poorly furnished 2-bedroom apartment, just off of Devon.  Since we meet with the family on Fridays at a time when all the children are usually at school, we have only interacted with the father L.P, the mother N.H, and the youngest child who was home sick, N.K.  To be honest, I’m happy that the children are at school when we come over because the reality of the situation is that due to their young age and constant exposure to the English language, American children, and teachers at school the children will learn the language as quickly as immigrant children do while naturally leaving their parents behind.  Therefore, I think it’s great that for the three hours a week that we see L.P and N.H, we can just concentrate on them and their needs.  However I must admit that the process of befriending the family has been a lot different than what I had expected.

Behman Behnia in “An Exploratory Study of Befriending Programs with Refugees” writes that one of the problems befriending organizations face is the retention of volunteers. He lists a few reasons for this, among them the idea that volunteers experience discrepancies between their expectations and the reality of their personal volunteer experiences.  Although I am not nearly disenchanted enough to quit, and in fact I am really enjoying our meetings, I have recognized that I too have experienced some of these discrepancies.

I believe that the major obstacle slowing our befriending process has been a very prominent language barrier between us.  As I have mentioned above, L.P and N.H have only been in America for just over two months (They arrived December 13, 2012), and have had no prior experience with the English language.  When we first met the family, they were just learning their ABCs and simple vocabulary like “Hi, Hello, Bye.”  It was very difficult to communicate, and although we laughed a few times due to miscommunication and inability to express what we want to say with crazy sign language, getting to know one another even on the surface was close to impossible.  Yet unwilling to give up that easily, we decided to take the opportunity view of looking at cross-cultural encounters, accept the challenge and get to work.  Looking back on our three weeks with the family I would be more inclined to call our relationship a teacher-student one rather than one of befriending or culture brokering.

In meeting with the family we have not been sitting down and enjoying food together, playing card games, or discussing cultural differences.  Especially in regards to the last point, this is rather impossible at the current moment because neither L.P nor N.H have a rich enough vocabulary to express these ideas or ask questions.  Instead we have adopted the roles of teachers, or personal tutors, sitting down with them at the table and reviewing basic phrases, vocabulary, and grammar.  In fact as Professor A hinted in class, since our first meeting they have been referring to us as “teacher.”  L.P has workbooks and worksheet packages with different lessons that we work on, but it is more difficult with N.H because she cannot read or write even in her native language.  When L.P works on his material, he will write out what he is learning in English and then produce notes, in what I assume is Burmese, which explain the concepts to him or provide phonetic translations.  N.H cannot employ the same tactic and when we arrive she struggles to remember the material we covered from the week before. We have drawn on Mary Pipher’s advice from the appendix of her book “Middle of Everywhere” and have been trying to use short simple sentences, speak slowly and clearly, and watch for signs to tell whether they really understand what we are explaining to them or are just pretending to understand.  This realization that for a good portion of the information we are trying to convey, they just nod their heads in understanding, when clearly you see they don’t get it is a bit frustrating and tiring, but we stay calm and always try to find another approach through which the information can be expressed.

Even though I feel like the best way to describe our relationship so far is like that of a teacher and student, I think it is also slowly transforming as we are all getting more comfortable with each other and their English is slowly getting better.  It would be unrealistic to expect the same sort of relationship right away that Mary Pipher writes about when she mentions Sadia, Zena, or Zeenat and her daughters especially with the language barrier there.  Mary Pipher didn’t build these friendships that led to common camping trips and phone calls asking for help overnight.  It was a process and it will be a process for us too.  I realize that as their English improves, they will be able to communicate more and take advantage of us as resources more fully, and that until that time we just have to be responsive and help them with the language as much as possible.

It was only at our last meeting that for about the last hour the formal atmosphere broke down and we began to interact in a more unofficial manner.  I don’t really know what prompted the sudden change of pace, but suddenly they felt compelled to share some of their life story with us (albeit mostly through an extreme version of charades and single keywords).  First L.P brought out their digital alarm clock from the bedroom, plugged it in, and looking at me said, “No work.”  It was the first time he had asked us for help with something that was not ELL related.  I took it as a good sign.

For the rest of the day they told us about themselves.  L.P wrote out the names of all their children, explained how they lived in Bangkok for twenty years before coming to America, about their crazy 4-layover flight to Chicago, and about the rest of their family in Thailand and Chicago.  He showed us pictures from Thailand of him and his sons at a Buddhist Monastery where his sons had gone to school, expressed distaste for Bangkok and life there, and explained that they came to Chicago because N.H’s two sisters already lived here.  I recognized the presents of extended family in Chicago as beneficial to them.  Behnam Behnia makes the point that having family in the same place as where you have been resettled helps make the transition easier.  It also made me think whether this was the reason that they were not trying to ask us questions about America; they had family with which they could communicate in their native tongue, who have lived in Chicago for a long time, who could answer any questions they had, and with whom they maintained very close contact.

When L.P showed us the pictures from the monastery and informed us that they were Buddhists (he had also told us that he learned to read and write because he had also been in a monastery) we asked if they went to the temples in Chicago.  To our surprise they had said no.  We were a bit puzzled especially since they had family in Chicago that could probably take them or at least point them in the right direction.  So we volunteered to take them if they ever wanted to go, identifying this as a great opportunity for a cross-cultural experience.  They were thrilled and agreed right away.  We were excited because it seemed we finally found something we can do for them outside of just helping them with their vocabulary.  To our surprise L.P got up, headed to the calendar, pointed at October and said “Go temple October yes?”  We had automatically assumed that Buddhists go to the temple at least as often as Christians go to church, or Jews go to synagogues and felt silly for failing to recognize these cultural and religious differences.

Overall, I feel like we are just getting to the point where our relationship is transitioning from formal to something more of befriending.  Although the majority of our efforts still go towards studying English, I feel we have already learned a lot about them and are working in the right direction towards establishing a closer relationship.  I hope to find and bring a map to our next meeting, and maybe share something more about who we are so that they know more about us than just our names and role as “teacher.”

Paper III

Seeing as this is the final reflection paper I am to write for this course, I would like to begin by saying that I have thoroughly enjoyed the experience of aiding my refugee family in their transition to life in the United States, and in teaching them some basic English skills.  I am very pleased to have met such wonderful people as L.P and N.H, who have always treated my partner and me with the utmost respect, have welcomed us into their home, and have maintained a friendly environment throughout all of our lessons.  I will surely miss the family and feel that if I were not leaving Chicago for graduate school in a few weeks, I would definitely continue to volunteer with the family and help them in any way I could.

As I mentioned in my previous reflections, the major roadblock that the K. family is currently facing is their extremely limited vocabulary and knowledge of the English language.  Due to this, we have only had a few “conversations” in which we learned something about their backgrounds or about their current life in America, and have focused almost entirely on teaching.  Yet our weekly, three hour meetings have not been nearly enough for them to make significant leaps in their learning.  They have expressed that every once in a while they go to some English language program, but it has usually been the case that only L.P goes.  We have questioned N.H about why she does not go with her husband and she has expressed that she must stay home with the children.  I am unaware of where the K. family goes for their lessons, if it is at the Volag’s location or run by an affiliate, but I feel that these facilities should include something like a daycare service in which the parents can leave their kids for the duration of the lesson.  I recognize that in families such as the K’s, in which there are 7 members total, it may be unrealistic to have them all take public transportation to and from the site, and would recommend that a shuttle service be created.

Yet I also realize that in order to expand the Volag’s operations to this extent, the agencies would have to be operating on much greater budgets.  As the Volag’s budget is made up of private donations and allocated funds from the government, the federal government would have to provide more money for the Office of Refugee Resettlement so that it could trickle down to the Volags.  This would most likely have to come about through the reallocation of federal spending, for example by cutting defense.  Unfortunately even a move like this opens us up to new problems that I will address further down, but first I would like to provide a hypothetical example regarding the reallocation of funds from the defense budget to the ORR.

One C-17A Globemaster III airplane, of which the United States has over 200, has an estimated price tag of $328 million dollars.  If just one Globemaster III transport plane was cut from the budget, and that $328 million dollars was handed over to the ORR, then the ORR would be capable of providing 48,235 refugees with an additional $850 dollars a month for 8 months! That’s an additional $850/month for about 80% of the total number of refugees the US takes in each year.  If we wanted to provide all of the estimated 60,000 refugees that America takes in any given year with additional funds, than each refugee would receive an additional $683.33/month.

Although this money could be put to good use by the refugees themselves, I believe that it would be even better to hand over these funds to the agencies in order for them to be able to expand their operations, hire more employees, and provide more services for the refugee community.  Unfortunately a move such as this would also be met with great opposition.  On the one hand, this move smells a lot like socialism, an ideology that the majority of Americans are petrified of.  Then again, even if the move sounds like a good idea, why is it being implemented to help foreigners and not low income Americans who are also struggling to get by?  Furthermore, which politician is going to stand up and announce that this is what he intends on doing, especially since there is a perception that refugees may be connected to terrorists?

This last point, that there is a perception that refugees may be terrorists, has probably been the greatest surprise to me in this class!  I have never thought of refugees as possible terrorists, and always felt that it is rather immigrants that Americans tend to fear more.  Considering the extensive screening process conducted on each eligible candidate for resettlement, and the unimaginable horrors that these people have had to endure, I have always thought of refugees more as victims with an extraordinarily strong will to survive rather than as predators.  I feel that before we can even begin to reform any aspect of refugee resettlement, we should launch an extensive campaign to raise awareness and inform the public all the way down to the simplest folk, about who the refugees really are and what they have been through.  Americans need to understand why this group of people would be selected to receive additional government funding and why it is morally justifiable.

The last point I would like to make is that even if we get everyone onboard with expanding funding and services for refugees, we still face a dilemma from within the Office of Refugee Resettlement.  Namely, with these new funds, do we expand our operations and allow more refugees to resettle in the United States, or do we maintain our quota and expand services provided to the current refugee community?  As you can tell I believe that there are many obstacles and concerns regarding what should be done to reform the system, yet I also wholeheartedly believe that it is our moral duty and obligation to help these people, who have been through hell, to find peace in the United States of America.

Reflection#3

If you were to turn on the news, you would immediacy come face to face with the overwhelming hardships and violence affecting our nation currently.  The prominence of these problems has caused an immense amount of fear, sadness and anger in the citizens of America, changing the way we view the world and each other. In the society we live in today, one would imagine that Americans would be fully empathetic towards the difficulties of refugees face during resettlement, but this is not always the case. Even in a country that preaches individualism, people often tend to discriminate against those who are do not conform to American culture.  Due to a lack of knowledge and education by the population at large, many misconceptions exist and continue to thrive regarding the status and characteristic of newly resettled refugees and the agencies that support them.

Through my experiences of working with refugees over the past few years, I have come to know more a personal, and accurate view of their lives and status in America.  In my opinion, it is not the refugees, volunteers or resettlement agencies, in the wrong, but the politics and finances that cause the problems associated with refugee resettlement.  Therefore, through this analysis of my service, I shall reflect upon my own misconceptions regarding refugees, the problems with refugee resettlement in the United States and what we as a nation can do to better serve this population.

The first time I met my refugee family in the beginning of my freshman year, I must admit I was pretty intimidated.  Three weeks prior, I had attended the required training to become a befriender and received an email stating my Bhutanese families address.   Though I had a bit of experience working with Sudanese refugees in high school, I felt unprepared for the type of service I was about to embark upon. It was my mine and my partner’s responsibility to call our refugee family to set up a time to meet, which was difficult because they did not speak much English.  We had to meet each other for the first time, travel through Rogers Park to find their house, and go through the awkward introduction phase on our own. We entered a tiny studio apartment housing what I believe was about six people.  The husband of the family, his pregnant wife and two children slept on the floor, while his parents shared a single bed-bug filled bed.

To say the least, we both were shocked by what we saw. I attempted a few Nepali words to break the ice and pulled out my new iPhone to show them pictures of my family and friends.  At first, I was ashamed by the way our country lives in comparison to theirs and was afraid that I did the wrong thing for my first visit.  To my surprise, when I showed up a week later, I was greeted with photo albums and youtube videos of their past life in Bhutan.  They did what they could to tell me stories of their struggle and hope for a better life in America. It was an incredible melding of cultures, and the start of an amazing friendship.

It has been two years since I met my refugee family and I will forever be humbled by what I have heard and learned from them.  While we have differences, we are very much the same in the end, and I feel like I am a part of their family. Refugees are not broken and deserving of pity but instead strong, warm, and beautiful people.  In the end, our awkward first encounter worked out for the best, but I believe it could have been better, for both mine and my partners sake, but more important, my family’s.

The presentation on volunteer agencies duties and responsibilities taught us that refugees must be provided with furniture and adequate housing. Though it is feasible that my family sold their furniture for money, the fact that the only furniture in the house was a single bed, a table and four chairs seemed odd.  Also, the fact that they even needed to sell teir furniture is incredibly sad to me.  As a volunteer, I felt overwhelmed and on my own, which made me imagine how difficult life is for refugees.  I was and am frustrated with the systems in place.  Though some volunteer agencies have implemented successful programs with befrienders and for refugees, I personally knew that some agencies were not, which is not fair for the refugees who have already been through immense hardships.

Despite all of this, I know that for the most part, the Volags are not the ones to blame.  They do the best that they can with the few resources they are given.  They do incredible work for a large number of people under stressful circumstances.  In the end, the government must change policies and give better aid to newly resettled refugees.  They expect too much from people who are new to a county and culture, and give them the bare minimum to survive.  In order to truly solve the problems associated with resettlement one would have to end the causes of refugees in the first place, but that is a whole separate issue.   I do not have the answer as to truly make the system work better, but I do feel that the place to begin would have to be in the financial sector. A bit more money could possibly be able to help solve the problems I faced during my initial visit with my family, and aid the population at large. Overall, I believe that resettlement agencies are doing the best they can with what they are given by the government. I advocate that nations need to put aside politics and view refugees, and all human beings, as ends in and of themselves rather than means to their and their country’s own prosperity.

Reflection #2: The Refugee Befriending Program

As I stated in my first reflection, I am no novice to the refugee befriending program and process.  I have spent countless hours formulating and building a strong, pseudo family-like relationship with a Bhutanese refugee family for almost two years now. For a myriad of reasons, I have found my time working with refugees in the setting of a befriending program to be a blessing rather than “work” as some people may refer to it.   Taking this course in some ways is an added benefit.  I gained class credit for continuing to purse a deep passion of mine. In saying all of this, it must have come as a complete shock when I told my friends and family I still had a lot to learn when it comes to refugees.  I did not believe that this class would change anything about the way that I viewed refugees and our current political policies, and to that end I was correct.   All of those concepts and knowledge were gained and understood though basic logic, reasoning and personal viewpoints gained through independent study and old-fashioned experienced- based learning.  In regards to this class, I mainly hoped that I would gain the important knowledge regarding the resettlement process and the politics behind it.  I never anticipated or recognized that my views of this important form of service would be impacted and altered. But of course, they were, and I shall be reflecting upon this change through this analysis of my continued work with befriending refugees and my impact upon them.

The befriending program has an immense deal of positive qualities. Mary Pipher puts it best by stating, “Refugees come from a fire into a fire” (Pipher, 2002).  These individuals are coming from situations far worse than what the average American can even conceive.  Even more, they enter an environment so vastly contrasting to their own that it creates a new collection of problems of their own merit.   Solving these problems on one’s own would be a huge task for most people, but even more so for those who have been living in complete dependency for so long. America is individualistic, monochromic and Universalist, which is far different from what their lives before.  Being capable of making the very slightest positive change or impact on these individuals’ lives is a true blessing.  Speaking from experience, I’ve noticed a difference in my refugee family over the past two years.  Their English has improved incredibly, the father is employed and they seem to have a better understanding of American culture.  They want to learn about my culture just as much as I want to understand theirs.  It is such a beautiful partnership.  On Diwali, I made them cookies and came over for a celebration, and on Thanksgiving they made me fresh roti for my family.  They have come to understand that during Lent, I don’t eat meat, and I’ve become accustomed to them casually chopping up a goat on the kitchen floor.  When my partner and I enter their home, we create a wonderful mixture of cultures that blends to create one American-Bhutanese family.  I really appreciate that the befriending programs bridges a gap between tragedy, fear and discouragement to a place of support and relative comfort.  Through this program, I can be that bridge between cultures for them.

Being an individual who chose Psychology and Theology as her majors, it appears logical that I have a tendency to analyze everything when I begin to reflect upon my experiences.  Since beginning college, I have been taught to go further and overanalyze ideas and situations to an almost unhealthy degree, which is what I have been doing lately regarding the befriending programs and my personal involvement in them.  In classes where I’m taught that skepticism is necessary and nothing can be proven for certain, I wondered how truthfully impactful my service has been to refugees.  The article by Behnia states that not much is known about the exact implication of the befriending program, but while it does provide emotional support to refugees, finding committed volunteers and measuring the effects that they have on refugees is difficult (Behnia, 2008).    In reading this, along with my own skepticism, I have come to question whether the program actually helps refugees in the long run, or is it just putting a bandage on a large-scale problem.  As the article addresses, if volunteers are ineffectively helping, or not doing their intended service, than what good will the program do?  In class we discussed the idea that you are only supposed to help as much as you need to and no more.  I can infer that there are a large amount of volunteers who promote dependency through their service, and as expected, the refugees will go along with and encourage this behavior because it is easier and less strenuous for the short term. While it would be easier to give my family the answers to questions on homework or ELL worksheets, I have to think of the long term and the impact my service will have on the betterment and ease of their future lives in American society. Volunteers must constantly keep in mind that one day, we might not be there to give them the answers. However, promoting autonomy is essential in fully immersing into the American lifestyle.  Volunteers aren’t needed to put a bandage on a large problem, but instead be the cheerleaders and scaffolds that refugees need in order to not only thrive, but also flourish. I feel that the essential word to keep in mind while volunteering is “friend.”  What appears to be implied by all sources is that refugees need friends from their new place of residence.  Friends help, support, teach and love, but they also know their limits and want to see the best for those they care about.  As Benhia implies, some volunteers neglect the friend aspect, and some, I would imagine, take it too far.

This is where problems come in with the refugee-befriending program.  It is not the program in and of itself that is flawed, but I have come to recognize through lecture and the articles, that the problems stem from the volunteers in and of themselves.  As with all programs, if not implemented correctly, it is doomed to create incomplete or “flawed” results.  This frustrates me immensely as it is something I wish there was a single, simple and clear answer to combat it.   Thankfully, frustration can produce action and change.  I continue to ask myself how I will use the information I have been taught and gained through experience. What is my knowledge of refuges going to help if I’m not actively working to stop the problem of refugees in the world?  As a society we cannot passively serve others or learn about a problem, because in that case, nothing is going to change. We must approach the befriending program with the idea in mind that we are serving to make a difference in these individuals’ lives and becoming their friend.

So does the befriending actually work?  I suppose so.  It is important work overall, but as with all programs, it has its flaws. The program makes me increasingly aware that there are millions of people in far worse conditions then they are here in America.  I can’t help them all, and that infuriates me.  I learn so much from this class, and it seems so overwhelming to think that while I am helping individuals, those 1% of resettled refugees, what about the other 99% that will forever be scarred by war, violence and statelessness?  Those people that will never receive the medical and psychological care they deserve and require. It inspires and motivates me that I can make a difference in even a few of these people’s lives.  The befriending program has provided me with many days of great joy, and to that end, I will work to educate people further on how to properly work to make the lives of newly resettled refugees simpler in the long-term.

Behnia, B. (2008). An exploratory study of befriending programs with refuges. Journal of Immigrant and Refugee Studies,5(3),1-19.

Pipher, M. (2002). The middle of everywhere: helping refugees enter the american community.Orlando, Florida: Harcourt, Inc.

As a Catholic Christian, I am called to love and serve others as Jesus did, and to treat all of His creatures with dignity and respect. Knowing this, it comes as no shock when I say that service is and has always been a huge part of my life.  I have spent most of my life thus far helping others in numerous ways, but the most impactful service I’ve done has been working with refugees.  Refugees have endured so many horrific hardships and trials but yet, have some of the most beautiful, positive and happy spirits that I’ve ever come across.  To be short, my time working with refugees has changed my view on the world, my possible vocation, and most importantly my life. It seems odd for me to write a “pre-service” reflection paper about working with refugees, mainly because this isn’t my first (or my last) time doing this type of service. I’ve come to the decision that I’m am writing this about my initial expectations and interactions with my refugee family, whom I met a little over a year ago and the attitudes I have about working with a new family.  Before I talk about this, I feel that I must share why I am even in this class and writing a paper on my passion for helping refugees.

As a young girl, I wanted to reach outside the figurative walls of my suburban town and understand people and the problems that plague their everyday lives. I had this deep passion for serving others and working for change, but as an eleven year old, I had a hard time finding an outlet. I dreamed of doing missions work in Africa or Asia when I got older and yearned for a way to reach out and address the issues I felt so strongly about. It came as no surprise that as soon as I entered my high school, I helped form and join multiple social justice groups, most involving refugees to some extent. It seemed like the logical next step to work directly with refugees, instead of just for or in support of them as I had been doing all through high school. So while looking for colleges with a dedication for service, I found Loyola Refugee Outreach and was sold. I had no idea that newly resettled refugees were only an hour away from my hometown, and less than ten minutes from my new school.   I could not wait to dive into this newfound world of working one on one with a refugee family.  I felt that my previous experience and knowledge had prepared me perfectly for this.

Little did I know however, that there is a massive distinction between working for refugees and working with refugees.  I learned very quickly that when you are working for someone, you are only giving of yourself, but if you are working with someone, it is a give and take process.   I will never forget the first words from my instructor at training, “Let me be the first to say that you are really brave for being here.” Talk about a wake up call.  I was no longer working with Sudanese refugees who had been in the United States for years and had adjusted to American culture. This was the real deal.  It was like I was going on a mission trip in my own backyard, and that both terrified and excited me. I wondered whether I would be just a little too awkward for this family who had endured such turmoil already. Nevertheless, a month after my training, I was emailed an address and a day after that, lost in Rogers Park with a girl I had met ten minutes prior in search of my Nepali family.

Upon (finally) entering my family’s home, I was immediately taken out of my world, and brought into theirs. I knew enough to greet them with “Namaste” and they greeted us with “Hello”, but besides that, the language barrier was very noticeable.  As an English speaking American, I’ve very heavily relied upon most people being able to communicate with me within seconds of being with these people I realized that for most of my life, I’ve really taken communication for granted. Since I did have some prior experience working with refugees, I knew to bring along a sheet with a few Nepalese words and phrases, hoping that it would help make the experience less awkward.  I have never before gotten so many adults to laugh so easily as I did while trying to speak Nepali. I felt like a stand up comedian.  While the adults caught their breath, I found the kids and as soon as I mentioned the word Pokemon, I had eight new best friends crawling up me as if I were a tree. During that first few visits, I felt what could be described as a mild form of culture shock.  I was not used to their norms, beliefs or customs.  I realized that if I felt this way after spending four hours a week in their home, they must be so uncomfortable and scared.  It was then that I realized how profound it was to be working with newly resettled refugees.  I was living out my call to service and at the same time receiving so much in return.

I feel that when I visit my family, I am getting more than I am giving.  Being a part of their family has brought me so much joy, knowledge, and passion.  With each visit I learned a lot about myself. I learned that being awkward has its advantages. That when you say that your favorite American food is a hamburger, that you should be prepared to deal with the consequences of telling children that you eat their god.  Most importantly learned that I have loved my service working with refugees so far.  They have made me a better person and have deepened my faith as a Christian and citizen of this world.  I remember the question, “How can we as Americans be so blind to the suffering, even when it’s in own community?” echoing in my mind as I left their house that first day, and I have used that as a driving point as I work to educate others of the plight of refugees.

As I embark upon the next step in my journey of helping refugees, I can honestly say that I am ecstatic.  The idea of helping another family thrills me.  I look forward to the awkward first interaction where I am make a fool of myself trying to speak their native language.  I can’t wait to make their adjustment to life in Chicago smoother. I’m most looking forward to becoming friends, and eventually family, with more people who are so full of life, lessons and beauty.  This work is my passion, and learning more about these people and their struggles so that I can better serve them is a true blessing.  I cannot wait to see what this next step in service brings.

#1: Beginning of Semester

I am a lucky person. I am a United States citizen, who for my entire life has been lucky enough to possess a home; southeastern Wisconsin is my home, my place of refuge. The same cannot be said for those individuals who roam the country, endlessly tired, searching for their own home, and their own place of refuge. Who are these weary travelers? They are refugees: men, women, children, entire families and friends who, unbeknownst to many, live all around us in our cities, towns and neighborhoods. According to the United Nations High Commission for Refugees, there are approximately 16 million refugees in the world today, an all time high, and an astounding number of people who lack the ability to safely say that they too possess a home.

For me, this is simply the beginning of an extraordinary 16-week journey that I have embarked upon.  Prior to last week, refugees were possibly the farthest thought in my mind.  Much like a Chicago police cruiser flying down Sheridan road: they were a momentary vision, a fleeting thought. In the four years that I have lived, studied and socialized, in the Rogers Park and Chicago area, never once did I hear that Rogers Park possesses a community heavily defined by its refugee population. This population is not simply comprised of families from Mexico, Canada, or South America. The refugees in Rogers Park are families, friends, relatives, neighbors, human beings, from around the world. It is amazing to me that in a few short weeks I will be blessed with the opportunity to work with a refugee family. To demonstrate the “American way of life,” and to give them the peace-of-mind and understanding that they no longer have to travel tirelessly in search of an abstract: a true home. I am looking forward to this experience, not only because it will be eye opening, but because it will be a challenge, physically and emotionally. In the days, weeks, and months to come, it is my hope that I will be able to take a small portion of my American spirit, and present it to my refugee family as a welcome mat into their new home and new life. I hope to demonstrate that life can be and will be so much better, with each new day bringing a whole host of new opportunities and experiences. More importantly, I hope to transform the family into individuals who look ahead instead of over their shoulders.

Truly, I do not know what to expect with regard to this experience. I am excited, yet there is the ever present twinge of apprehension. I imagine that the first few encounters will be somewhat of a shock. I anticipate the impending awkwardness, but hope that I have the strength to embrace it simply as a byproduct of this amazing experience. By the end of this 16-week, structured journey, I hope to possess the necessary skills and rapport with the family, not only to call them my friends, but to be able to embark upon a completely new and boundless adventure as we continue our friendship together.

At this point, my desire is that this semester will reveal personal characteristic growth and development. I look forward to the future opportunities to reflect upon my shared experiences with the family, and to see how those experiences have altered my individual personality and character traits. As the common saying goes, “change is good.” Perhaps my refugee family has already embraced this mentality, realizing that their new lives are a blessing, something to be embraced, not hidden away from view. Perhaps I will be the one who learns the most from this new opportunity. Perhaps I will be the one with a new place to call home.

#2: Middle of Semester

From Fire into Fire

“And that is how change happens. One gesture. One person. One moment at a time.”

-Libba Bray

            If one were to ask me to depict the most remarkable aspect of my refugee experience thus far, it would be challenging to pinpoint one single event or interaction fitting the description of “remarkable.” Nearly half-way through my first glimpse into the lives lead by our nation’s refugee population, the most remarkable aspect of my journey has been the fact that amidst outstanding chaos, angst, and uncertainty lies the most rewarding experience that I have ever been apart of. Working with and befriending a refugee family began as a fleeting thought, but now that thought has blossomed into a new and beautiful reality. My refugee family is bursting with optimism; a second chance at life in the United States of America has instilled upon each of them new hopes and dreams. In just a few hours of interaction and time spent together I have seen the impact that American freedom has had on my family: they gleefully exclaim “America good! America people good! America good!” At this point in their journey as refugees they finally have a concrete belief to hold onto and trust; America is a land where everyone has a dream.

America is the land of opportunity. For refugees, it is a utopia full of the greatest gifts that life has to offer. That being said, my study of refugees and the processes behind gaining entrance to the United States has yielded alarming results. This is best illustrated by Mary Pipher’s novel entitled, “The Middle of Everywhere;” America is a land that offers so much to hopeful refugee families, but it is not until they set foot onto American soil that reality sets in; ultimately, they have “come from a fire into a fire.” Refugees require our support. There is a limited amount of continued assistance that volunteer agencies such as the Immigrant and Refugee Community Organization (IRCO) and the International Rescue Committee (IRC) can provide. Typically, these agencies focus on resettlement services such as arranging for food, housing, clothing, employment, counseling, medical care and other immediate needs during the first 90 days after arrival. After this initial period of time, additional services are provided to pre-approved individuals but the majority of refugees are in a still relatively unfamiliar environment with unanswered questions, seemingly impossible language barriers, and an American dream that can quickly be replaced by an overwhelming nightmare.

To combat the effects of this transition period many volunteer organizations are turning toward Befriending Programs for refugees. Befriending programs are a form of support system in which people without adequate emotional and material resources are matched with volunteers who act as a friend and offer support and friendship for a determined period of time (Behnia, 2008). Working with my refugee family for these first few weeks has evolved from a required weekly meeting of complete strangers, to a reciprocal companionship, a type of “befriending program” in which we are both learning from and helping each other. Looking back at my initial predictions and expectations towards this experience, I can honestly say that I did not expect the relationship that I would develop with my new refugee family to grow as quickly as it has. The sheer magnitude of generosity, caring, and compassion demonstrated thus far has been overwhelming. From the beginning I was tentative with regards to the uncertainty surrounding refugees and befriending programs. Lacking any previous experience with refugees, my only resource for information on what to expect from the first few visits came in the form of Mary Pipher’s novel. I became increasingly anxious as I read her descriptions of the potential awkwardness involved in refugee interactions: mispronunciations of names, accidently engaging in offensive behavior, and the language barrier. In retrospect I believe that my anxiety was rooted in the fear of being unable to assist my family: how would I communicate with them if they did not know English? What if I accidentally offended them? Could I really make a difference in what I could only imagine was a life-changing event? The moment I met my family, all my fears vanished; I was in the presence of four complete strangers yet I felt safe, secure, happy, and at-home. Not only did that moment alter the way in which I viewed the refugee experience, but it also changed my perspective regarding Pipher’s novel: her message is not one of perpetual fear towards encountering refugees; rather, she challenges her readers to embrace the uncertainty surrounding those situations because that is how change happens and a unique difference is made.

Though my family possesses an enormous amount of optimism and gratitude toward their current situation as new refugees in America, I know that they still have much to overcome. Their current emotional and mental state is characteristic of the “honeymoon phase” of the resettlement process: they have been in the United States for a little over two months, continue to receive financial assistance, and as previously mentioned, America is “good” to them. I find myself worrying about the parent’s apparent lack of urgency towards obtaining employment; however, I also understand the difficulties faced by refugees trying to secure a job with little-to-no proficiency in the English language. Additionally, I try to remind myself that they have only been in the United States for two months: there is still time to get settled and become employed before the government assistance ends. For me, it is an emotional rollercoaster because I wish my family to have the best possible resettling experience by maintaining low levels of frustration, helplessness, and discouragement. Taking that into account, I believe that a major difference has already been made in their lives due to befriending. This period in a refugee’s journey is marked by increased vulnerability to a false sense of security, the darker side of the American way of life—scams targeting refugee families, uncooperative and greedy landlords, exploitation of foreign employees by business owners, etc.—and the overwhelming nature of having to reinvent their identity as an American citizen. Having a volunteer by their side to help guide them towards logical, safe, and beneficial decisions is one of the best ways to begin the acclimation process for refugees. That being said, befriending is not without its limitations. Despite its important contributions to refugees’ adjustment to a new society, very little is known about the long-standing benefits of befriending programs (Behnia, 2008). Furthermore, befriending is only useful as a preliminary support system; meaning, that in order to be successful in American society refugees must be capable of assessing new situations, processing information, and making their own informed decisions. Befriending programs are excellent temporary solutions to the difficulties of resettlement; however, they should not become permanent crutches for refugees to lean on.

Overall, my family has voiced their appreciation for the help that I have been able to provide, and I think that my presence acts as a secondary form of reassurance that they are on their way towards a safer and happier life. I wish to see my family excel in American society. I understand that they have many challenges and obstacles yet to overcome, but I am confident in their determination to procure the best possible outcome of their new situation. I look forward to the coming months and the opportunity to watch my family grow together as American citizens. Realistically, we are now on this journey together, and it is my job to take their hands and lead them home.

#3: Final Reflection

Creating a New Home

            If I had been asked at the beginning of the semester to provide a definition for “a refugee,” it would have been nearly impossible for me to do so. At that point in time, the concept of refugees was perhaps the farthest thought in my mind, which tragically, is the case for large percentage of individuals living in the United States of America. When one considers refugees in that context, the problem of not knowing what a refugee is, where they come from, and how they got here, seems miniscule. After all, there are other individuals living in this nation who get paid to ask those types of questions and figure out what to do with the thousands of refugees who travel to the United States on an annual basis, right? Maybe. With that said, the turning point for me and the way in which I chose to think about refugee people, came when I realized that hundreds of refugee families live in my own backyard, Rogers Park, the place where I have attended school for the last four years. From that point on, I was hooked. I immediately wanted to learn more about these people from all different parts of the world, who, unbeknownst to me, ride the same buses, walk the same sidewalks, and entertain similar goals and dreams as I do.

Midway through the semester I finally had a concrete definition of who a refugee actually is: A refugee is someone who has been forced to flee his or her country because of persecution, war, or violence. A refugee has a well-founded fear of persecution for reasons of race, religion, nationality, political opinion or membership in a particular social group. Most likely, they cannot return home or are afraid to do so. War and ethnic, tribal and religious violence are leading causes of refugees fleeing their countries. More importantly, I began to learn about the entire process of becoming a refugee: a journey often highlight by extreme stories of survival, fear, uncertainty, confusion, and even a little bit of luck. It was also at this point during the semester that I began to immerse myself in the practice of befriending with my refugee family. The weekly visits passed by way too quickly, and my partner and I always left wishing that we could stay for just another hour, or two…or three. I began to formulate my own [simple] definition of what refugees really are: refugees are some of the finest and most unique human beings that anyone could imagine spending time with. Working with refugees over the last four months has transformed me into a more humble individual. Additionally, working with refugees has been a remarkable experience because it is the only time in my life that I have ever been in the presence of human beings who cast their egos aside, which, I must say, has been incredibly refreshing.

Looking back on this semester and the experiences I’ve shared with my classmates and refugee family, it is astonishing how much I have grown as a person, not only in my understanding of refugees and the process of becoming one, but also in my appreciation of who they are as human beings. Moreover, this semester has taught me how to fully appreciate the unique gifts, talents, and cultural experiences that refugees bring to the Rogers Park and Chicago areas. The beginning of my experience was overshadowed by my own personal doubts and misconceptions regarding refugees in the United States. I anticipated a completely different interaction marked by confusion, frustration, and an overall lack of communication. Similarly, I expected that my refugee family would be completely helpless in their new American home; thus, my first few visits were incredibly nerve-racking because I expected the worst. Ultimately, my expectations proved to be entirely untrue. My family spoke [some] English, they were optimistic, and immediately made me feel as though I was part of their family.

Refuge in the United States ultimately requires adaption to a new society that presents a variety of options and constraints, and that has its own expectations about newcomers. Moreover, refugees are expected to live up to American societal standards: it is imperative for them to learn the basics of life in the United States. Without those basic skills, I believe that the chance for a successful life is nearly impossible. Overall, I have spent an incredible amount of time immersed in the United States refugee resettlement process this semester. From in-class lectures, to organized service activities, to the weekly visits with my family, I have seen both the good, the bad, as well as, the ugly, when it comes to refugee resettlement. As David Haines illustrates in his book entitled “Safe Haven,” the practice of refugee resettlement in the United States relies heavily upon the inner workings of the volunteer resettlement agencies (VOLAGS). The volunteer organizations provide refugees with immediate assistance ranging from airport pick-up upon arrival to the United States, to initial health screenings and ESL classes. Additionally, they provide the initial financial foundation for refugees once they are settled in their new American homes. With that said, many refugees still find themselves locked into a desperate situation: families struggle to pay rent, find adequate money for food, learn basic English, and obtain employment. Haines suggests that employment and learning the English language are the two most important achievements for refugees once they arrive the United States. Despite the fact that VOLAGS supposedly assist refugee families with these two tasks, many refugees are left to fend for themselves in terms of finding ESL classes and scheduling job interviews. For example, the father of my refugee family finally became bored with sitting at home waiting for his case work to help him prepare a resume, so he began walking around the Rogers Park area in search of any “Help Wanted” signs. To combat this issue I would suggest that VOLAGS attempt “out-source” refugee employment needs to other, separate organizations. With hundreds of cases being taken each month, it is easy for the VOLAGS to become overwhelmed, which makes it even easier for individuals to get lost in the system. With a separate organization helping out with employment, VOLAGS could potentially pass refugee families on for employment needs once the basic living and financial foundation has been solidified. Currently, I think that the most valuable assistance to VOLAGS is the process of befriending. Befriending acts as a middleman for refugees at times when VOLAGS are overwhelmed, or refugee families have a quick question or urgent need. More importantly, befriending allows refugees to build long-lasting friendships with American people; refugees feel more comfortable knowing that they have someone who understands the American culture and way of life.

In the years ahead, I hope to be able to look back upon this experience as one that changed who I am as a person. I have already learned so much about the refugee resettlement process and more importantly, I have met many incredibly unique and talented individuals from around the world. It is experiences such as this that excite me and fuel my desire to travel the world; I wish to meet new people, experience different cultures and hear new stories. Equally important is the fact that this experience has opened my eyes to the world that exists outside of America’s borders. Lucky for me, that world is traveling here to the United States. With that in mind, we all posses the necessary qualities to assist refugee families in their new American homes, but it is up to each and every one of us to take that leap outside of our comfort zone and extend our helping-hands to lead them home.

Working with refugees is an idea I have been thinking about for quite some time now. The origin of determination to become a physician stemmed from the deep desire to help those in real need. My ideal job would have me traveling to impoverished areas of the world that truly lack resources and really need medical aid. I find that helping the downtrodden is the greatest source of pleasure for me. There is something incredibly amazing about knowing that you went out of your way to reach out and relieve anxiety in some type of way; this is my reason for taking this class. The reading by Mary Pipher, in my opinion, served as a very good introduction into what it is like to work with refugee families and how rewarding it is to be there for them.

In the book I appreciated how the author starts off with a disclaimer, explaining how she has no intentions of offending any groups of refugees mentioned in the book. She conveys a very respectful tone, which I believe is essential in writing about such delicate subjects. The fact that the stories are told through the eyes of a typical American woman living in a very normal, typical American town is quite effective in conveying her points. It seems like the perfect setting into which refugees can come and make a huge, positive impact on the lives of people. The author speaks in a very humble tone, which I can very much appreciate, and glorifies neither Americans nor refugees as the better group of people. In fact, she describes Americans as “spoiled children in a world of hurting people” (31). Yet she also claims that she does not wish to “idealize refugees” (31) because there are all types of people in every ethnic group. However she does describe refugees as people who “come from a fire into a fire” (32). Using this type of language is very effective in describing the refugee experience within a culture like that in contemporary America. Growing up in an immigrant family, I can somewhat relate to the refugee struggle to relate and blend into mainstream American society. It is made especially difficult by certain attitudes and ideologies held by the majority of Americans, who as Pipher put, “are abysmally ignorant about the rest of the world” (31) and many times do not even care to know about it. Living in a society like this make the refugee experience even harder then it already is. However there are always those who genuinely care and who make very positive impacts on the lives of these struggling people, such as the Miss Pipher.

In talking about the Iraqi sisters, Pipher states that, “All of these women had spent their beautiful youth locked in a hut in Quetta. Now they were out of step with their own people as well as with Americans” (44). This statement was quite effective in soliciting an emotional response from me, as it forced me to imagine what it would be like for me to be stuck in the middle of every society I am presented with, and not be able to fully relate to any of them. The statement also helped me to realize how incredibly important keeping strong family ties between refugee families must be, because when the world fails you, you always have your family to fall back on. In addition, the author quoted a man who said, “ ‘Optimism is true moral courage’ “ (32); this statement struck a chord in me, as it allowed me to widen my admiration for refugees, because according to the author most of them keep an optimistic view of life despite the incredible amount of adversity they experience. Reflecting on their life outlooks led me to reflect on my own, and ask myself what the author claims most Americans usually ask themselves when presented with a story on extreme adversity, “ ‘What would I do in that situation?’ “(32). I am positive that working with families with such strong and optimistic people will push me to be much more grateful for the high-quality life I live, and to place a higher value on the things that really matter in life.

In anticipation for working with refugee families, I will take into account the author’s description of her reasons for wanting to see the refugee family consistently and vise versa; she’s said that “They needed the advice and support and I needed their joy at seeing me and their curiosity about the world” (42). I think this symbiotic relationship is a beautiful thing. It serves to give me hope for humanity as a whole, and it has encouraged me to join the circle of people who help each other with only good will for each other.