Visiting my refugee family with my partner Chelsea and my peer mentor Cody has proven to be a very eye-opening experience. I had the opportunity to meet and connect with a refugee family of five from Nepal on a weekly basis. The family consisted of the middle-aged mother, two older boys ages 17 and 14 respectfully, and then two younger girls ages 10 and 4 respectfully.
Visiting their apartment every week grew into a wonderful routine, where we learned to be ready to react with lightening reflexes when they buzzed us in for the duration of only about three seconds. Climbing the stairs to their floor acted as a physical metaphor of how we were feeling: growing more and more excited with every step. When we got to their floor we were always greeted by the familiar scent of authentic Indian cooking. Being welcomed into their home, the family never faltered in being extremely kind and generous by making us feel more than at home.
It was this openness and acceptance of us into their lives that really made an impact on me. That this family who had been through so much and were struggling to cope with American culture after only having been here for about seven months would unfailingly and time after time extend a never weary acceptance and welcoming gesture to us as strangers was simply astounding. This experience also taught me a lot about myself: that even if I had a test the next morning or if I was worn out from the past week, that making a real difference in someone’s life and seeing the impact you are making is an energizing experience.
I would always leave their home in higher spirits than when I arrived – they were all so eager to learn and practice their English that trivial things such as homework didn’t seem so big after all. This experience definitely helped me put things into perspective. That while learning what I am in school is very important – helping real humans teaches a different lesson: compassion. This compassion makes me more aware of my surroundings and the impact I have on other people.
Seeing my work with my refugee family come to fruition has been my most meaningful achievement so far. Visiting my family on a weekly basis and watching our relationship blossom has been amazing. Seeing the progression of the ten year old girl, who I’ll call Susie, from the first time I visited to when I saw her last week, has been extraordinary. I usually help Susie with math homework and it became apparent in our first few weeks together that this was not her favorite subject. What was initially a painful process – getting her to drag out her homework while I was there – transformed into her running for her backpack with a huge smile when she saw me at the door.
Finally, the overall spectrum of this journey has meant a lot to me. Before I even met the family I was unbelievably nervous about the most trivial of things: would they like me, would it be awkward, would they understand why we were there? Looking back the questions or thoughts I should have had in my mind should have been centered on what I could learn from them, not the other way around. Coming to see them as individuals just like me has made them seem all the more individual and holistic to me.
This transformation of how I see them has also affected me in a positive way and taught me the very important lesson not to judge. Although it is very easy to fall into the trap of making general assumptions, the more you can avoid it the better off you will be. I know that for me making this adjustment has made me so much more aware of how unique and individual each person really is.